


when the flowers are in bloom

by Lynn1998



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Pennywise (IT), Angst, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Georgie Denbrough Lives, Hurt and comfort, Internalized Homophobia, Lots of Angst, M/M, Penelope AU, Protective Losers Club (IT), Sonia Kaspbrak Being Terrible, Sonia Kaspbrak's A+ Parenting, Tag As I Go, facial deformity, for anyone who doesn’t know what Penelope is it’s a movie about a girl born with a pig nose, i just imagined him with one and I thought it was really cute aaaa, idk it might not, kinda slow burn, lots of fluff, obviously fluff, so Eddie has a pig nose, tags may change but rating will most likely stay the same, they are kids in this, you guys let me know lol
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:00:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 26,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22123726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lynn1998/pseuds/Lynn1998
Summary: Sonia Kaspbrak has a secret, and Richie accidentally finds out.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 33
Kudos: 141





	1. the flower

**Author's Note:**

> I love the movie Penelope so much and I thought it would be an interesting AU. You don’t need to watch the movie to understand the plot, Eddie is just born with a pig nose. If you need visualization, just google the Penelope movie. I promise you it looks so cute.

Richie had a nice and simple life. His life was just as you would imagine any fourteen year olds life would be. He went to school, hung out with his friends, Bill and Stan, and delivered the papers. Sure, he delt with the bad things too. Bullies at school and insecurities were impossible to avoid, and along with being known as the loud mouth in school he had enough on his plate. Still his life was good. It wasn’t perfect, but it was good. He had a home and a bed. His parents loved him and cared for him. Sometimes they struggled to understand the struggles teenagers go through nowadays, but they loved him regardless.

Every Sunday, Richie would wake up bright and early, and ride his bike down to the post office to pick up the daily papers. He then piled them in his basket, and tossed them onto the proches and front steps of the houses he was assigned to. Often times he woke up as early as possible to avoid certain clients, but sometimes it was unavoidable. He tossed the paper onto the front porch of one of his long time regulars and heard a familiar screech.

“Richard Tozier!” Screamed Mrs. Kaspbrak. Richie immediately stepped on his breaks and sighed before turning and propping his bike against the fence. He then walked back to the Kaspbrak house and smiled at the old wooden gate.

“Good morning, Mrs. K,” he greeted happily. Sonia stood in her robe and slippers with her arms crossed. Her hair was still in its rollers.

“Young man, do you know how many germs and microbes and bacteria is on the ground? You fetch me a new paper, and properly deliver it to my hands _immediately_ ,” she ordered sternly. 

Richie’s lips stretched into a tight smile before he nodded and turned to grab a new paper from his basket. He then returned and opened the gate so he could walk down her front path and up her porch to deposit the paper directly into her hand. She took it and sighed before pointing to the largish box on her doorstep. Richie felt his stomach sink.

“Now, help me move this box into my living room. I haven’t been able to move it since it arrived on Friday,” she said.

“Mrs. K, I’d love to help, but my deliveries—“

“Can wait an extra five minutes since you’re always a half an hour early for your deliveries,” Sonia snapped harshly before waddling through her front door. “You’re a strong young man. Just put it in my living room!” She called leaving the door open. Richie sighed and crouched to pick up the box. It really was heavy…

“Okay…”

“And _don’t_ go snooping around. Living room, and out,” she ordered and poured an assortment of pills into a glass dish as Richie struggled to hold the package.

He walked with wobbly legs into the living room and mustered all his strength into gently lowering the box onto the floor. Once it was safely on the carpet, he let out a deep breath when he heard a creak from upstairs. Richie paused and listened to the creaking until he heard a more distinct pattern leading to the staircase. A small boy, probably within a year or two of Richie’s age, with a surgical mask over his face bounced down a couple steps. Then, wide brown eyes connected with Richie’s face, and he quickly scurried back up the stairs. Richie felt his heart tighten as the split second of those boys eyes burned in his memory, and had a weird urge to follow him and ask his name.

“Richard! Are you about finished?” Sonia called from the other room. 

Richie took a moment to tear his eyes away from the spot the boy once was, and then walked back towards the front door. He stopped when he spotted Sonia pouring more pills into a second container and paused. Sonia was known to be a widow and an unfortunate childless mother. Her husband died shortly after she was pregnant, and her child was a stillborn. Usually people brushed off her rudeness as tragic sadness, but Richie’s mother wasn’t shy to say Sonia has always been, and to directly quite Maggie Tozier, a bit of a bitch. It was odd to see her preparing two dishes of medication, as well as a child in her home considering she allegedly had none alive. She looked up to see Richie staring at the assortment of medications, and frowned.

“What’s the matter? Don’t you have something more important to do? Like your job?” She suggested defensively. She strategically placed her pill bottles over the second dish to hide it. Richie shook his head to rid himself of his thoughts and smiled.

“Sorry, uh…is there someone else here? Like a niece or nephew? I thought I heard someone upstairs,” Richie asked. Sonia turned beat red and shook her head.

“No, that’s just my cat. She’s very sick. Now run along and get to your deliveries.”

“But Mrs. K—“

“Run along, Richard!” She ordered harshly and turned to bring the dishes upstairs. Richie left the house at that.

From that point on Richie couldn’t stop thinking about that boy. He was clearly being kept a secret by Mrs. Kaspbrak, but Richie had no proof he existed. A part of him wanted to tell Bill or Stan since they had a good pair a heads between the two of them, but another part of him didn’t think they would believe him. Stan would probably just tell him that it was unlikely what he saw was real, and if it was it wasn’t nearly as bad as Richie was painting it out to be. Bill would’ve been too weirded out by the fact that Richie was even in Mrs. Kaspbrak’s home, and would’ve compared it to the creepy house on Neibolt street. The first part of himself ended up winning and he told them, and shortly after he found that the second part of him was so correct it hurt.

“Y-y-you were _inside_ her c-cave?” Bill asked.

“Yeah, I didn’t really have a choice! She was ordering me around like I was her little servent, and I didn’t wanna lose another customer. I already lost a couple over the summer, and Mr. Turner will fire me I lose one more!” Richie replied defensively.

“Whatever you think Mrs. Kaspbrak is doing with that kid is not as bad as whatever the hell you’re imagining. That is, pretending for a moment that there really _was_ a kid and you’re not just making this up to pull our legs,” Stan said calmly. Although he seemed a little irked with Richie’s story.

“But he was totally real! We made eye contact! A man never forgets making eye contact,” Richie claimed proudly.

“Yeah, well let me know when a man saw what you saw and we’ll talk,” Stan snarked. Richie frowned and crossed his arms.

“I _know_ I saw someone. When I asked about the noise, she just said it was her cat,” he said.

“It probably was.”

“Uh, M-Mrs. K doesn’t have a c-c-cat,” Bill announced.

“How do _you_ know that?” Richie asked.

“Sh-sh-she told me o-one day. I was w-walking by her house and sh-she asked me to g-grab the paper for her on her s-sidewalk. I-I asked if she had a c-cat and she s-said no,” Bill told them.

“Maybe she adopted one between then and now,” Stan pointed out.

“Sh-she sounded very disturbed I would even ask. She kept g-g-going on about fleas and d-disease,” Bill explained.

“Yeah, she’s super fucked up about germs! Why would she have an animal? I saw a thirteen year old boy, like us, wearing a fucking doctors mask and looking like he saw a _ghost_ when he saw me,” Richie insisted. Stan and Bill looked at each other and then Richie.

“Even if you’re right—“

“I am!”

“…What do you want to do about it? We literally can’t do anything,” Stan pointed out.

“Let’s report her to the police! I dunno! Anything so I can like prove that I’m right!” Richie insisted.

“L-like the police would take us s-s-seriously. They’d laugh at our f-faces if we told them th-that,” Bill said. Richie pouted and stressfully ran his fingers through his hair.

“Ugh, fine! I’ll take care of this on my own!” He snapped and got up from their lunch table.

Taking care of it on his own turned out to be harder than he thought. Richie for one had no idea how to get back into Mrs. Kaspbrak’s house again. He also noticed weeks making his weekly deliveries after that incident that a lot of her windows were blacked out from the inside. Curtains always draw, but behind them a black board that covered from window sill to window sill. It was hard to spot at first, but after riding past her house for a year it was obvious that there was something there. He drove slower and slower each time, and he still tossed it instead of hand delivered. That was his protocol. He’d get fired if his boss found him handing out newspapers and wasting time instead of getting them out as fast as possible.

“Richard Tozier!” Sonia called again one day.

It had been approximately six months since the last time Mrs. Kaspbrak woke up early enough to catch Richie tossing her papers. He quickly jerked on his breaks and excitedly propped up his bike. He automatically grabbed an extra paper and hopped over to her front gate. She stood there, curlers a mess again with her robe and slippers, with an absolute evil eye stuck on Richie.

“Young man, what have I always told you? Hand deliver those papers to me, or I’ll have a chat with Mr. Turner,” she warned.

“Yes, Mrs. K,” Richie said before opening the gate and walking over to hand her the newspaper.

“Good. Now, while you’re here, I need you to take these gardening tools to my back shed. Don’t stick around any longer than you need to,” she warned and nudged the sparkling clean gardening gloves and tools. They all still had the tags on.

“Yes ma’am!” Richie nodded and crouched down to pick up the tools and gloves.

Sonia said nothing else and merely waddled back into her house, leaving Richie to do her bidding. Richie didn’t complain, and kept his eye out as he walked around her house to her backyard. It looked barren, and in desperate need of a lawn trim and a good sprinkler system. The shed was tucked away back into the corner, and Richie quickly made his way to it. He unceremoniously dumped the tools into the shed, and then closed the doors before turning to look up at the back windows.

One was uncovered, and Richie’s eyes instantly found the faded shade of human skin behind the glass. He blinked up and recognized it as the boy he saw before, and could more clearly see his bouncy brown hair and tiny shoulders hunched over as if he was trying to hide himself behind the curtains. His body was small, and dressed in a matching set of pyjama pants and shirt. He held his hand over his nose, and they made eye contact as soon as Richie stopped looking at everything else about him. He felt his chest tighten again as the boy stared at him, and he desperately wanted to yell and scream to talk to him. Ask him who he was. Ask him why he was locked up. Ask him why he made Richie feel so weird.

Their eye contact broke when the boy’s head jerked away to look past the curtains. He quickly looked back to Richie and shyly waved before hopping off the window sill and disappearing from Richie’s sight. Richie waved back, but he was already long gone by the time he did. He shook his head to rid himself of his thoughts, and sighed before returning to his route.

“I saw him again,” Richie announced in his room later that day after church with Bill and Stan. They were all taking turns on his new Gameboy he had gotten last Christmas. His parents promised him that if he got straight A’s that semester, Santa might get it for him.

“S-saw who?” Bill asked with most of his focus on the game. Richie fiddled with the edge of his blanket.

“The boy in Mrs. Kaspbrak’s house,” he said.

“You were in her house again?” Stan asked looking up from his book, patiently waiting his turn.

“No, just her backyard. He was sitting in the windowsill and we saw each other again. This time he waved,” Richie told them.

“M-maybe he wants to be f-friends,” Bill threw out there.

“Gee, I wouldn’t mind being friends too, but he’s currently locked away in his tower like fucking Rapunzel,” he said.

“Does he have long blond hair too?” Stan teased.

“No, it’s brown actually…and he was covering his face again too just not with a mask.”

“That’s kinda weird,” Stan hummed.

“Maybe you should b-bring a ladder next time,” Bill suggested. Richie rolled his eyes.

“Shut up, Buh Buh Buh Bill, and hand it over,” he said holding out his hand. Bill exited the game and did as he was asked. Richie then turned to hand it to Stan sitting in his bed, and continued picking at his blanket.

“Y-you don’t wanna play?” Bill asked. Richie shrugged.

“Stan has been waiting a while,” he murmured.

“Damn right I have,” he agreed and started the game over again.

“Y-y-you’re really hung up on th-this, aren’t you?” Bill asked. Richie sighed and leaned his head back.

“I’m just…confused…and I’m worried…and it’s just _weird_ ,” Richie replied. Bill nodded in agreement.

“Sh-she’s not a nice lady…I-I’m a little worried too, but I’ve never s-seen him.”

“I’m sure he’s okay. He’s probably being protected for a reason if he’s always covering his mouth. Perhaps he has some type of disease or immune system disorder. It would make sense why Mrs. Kaspbrak is so protective of him and defensive about germs,” Stan pointed out. Richie hummed and shrugged.

“Maybe…”

“Maybe we should check it out,” Stan suggested.

“Huh?” Richie asked.

“I’m curious now too, and it’s a Sunday so maybe she’s still at church or running errands. It wouldn’t hurt to ride by, and if her car is gone then we’ll investigate,” Stan proposed. Richie brightened up at that.

“Oh…yeah, that actually sounds like a really good idea,” he nodded. He then looked to Bill and he was already nodding.

“Y-yeah! Absolutely! W-we should go now,” Bill said jumping up to his feet. Richie joined him, and Stan turned off the game to stand as well.

“It’s still my turn when we get back though,” he said while they shuffled out the room.

“Of course, Stan the man! For this million dollar idea, anything you want!” Richie grinned.

Not only was his plan really good, but Stan was right in his prediction that Mrs. Kaspbrak wouldn’t be home. Her rickety old car was no where in sight, and the house looked pretty abandoned without it there. They all stood with their bikes outside the gate, and stared at the looking house behind it. Richie suddenly felt nervous, but shook his head before walking his bike a little bit over and propping it over the neighbors gate.

“C’mon, guys! Let’s get to it!” Richie prompted.

“Geez, this place is creepier than I remember,” Stan murmured and parked his bike next to Richie’s.

“It’s not that b-b-bad. It’s only because of th-that woman,” Bill assured him.

“C’mon, my young fellow explorers! Off to the wilderness that is Mrs. K’s backyard!” Richie cheered turning on his horrid British accent.

“Sh-shut up, Richie! J-just because she isn’t home, d-doesn’t mean no one can hear us!” Bill pointed out as they walked past the gate.

“Oh please, like any of her neighbors talk to her,” Richie replied.

“They might,” Stan murmured.

“But they possibly don’t, young Stanley, and I don’t blame them if they don’t!” Richie said continuing to use the British accent.

“Y-you’re so annoying sometimes, R-Rich,” Bill sighed. They both followed Richie to the backyard and wandered across the dead grass.

“That’s not what your mom said last night, Bill,” Richie snickered.

“You know, those jokes don’t get _better_ when you use them again, right?” Stan said. Bill laughed and they high-fived as Richie rolled his eyes.

“Whatever. Let’s just look around. Maybe we can get inside through the back door,” he suggested. 

Stan and Bill nodded before they all looked towards the door, and was surprised to see the small boy Richie was talking about standing in front of it. He had a jacket on, and a scarf around his face hiding just above his nose and down. They all paused to look at him, and he nervously shuffled his feet.

“Y-you guys can’t be here…my mom will come back soon,” he warned.

“Wait, she’s your fucking _mom?_ “ Richie asked.

“I thought Mrs. K l-lost her kid,” Bill said. The boy looked around, clearly panicked.

“Sh-she’s coming soon! You guys better buzz off before she catches you back here!” He warned again.

“When can we come back?” Richie asked. Bill and Stan gave him a weird look, and he blushed and shrugged. The other boy looked like he might be blushing too, or that he was pinched red with anxiety.

“N-never! I’m not allowed to talk to you, so you better get going!” He urged.

“Rich, I think we should go,” Stan said. Bill seemed conflicted as well.

“What’s your name?” Richie asked desperately.

“That…that’s not important,” the kid said hiding behind his scarf. It was barely fall. It seemed odd that he would be cold enough for a scarf. 

“Tell me your name, or I’m not leaving,” Richie claimed stubbornly.

“R-Richie!” Bill hissed.

“What? I-“

“My name is Eddie, okay? Just…leave before she catches us,” the boy urged before turning and hurrying inside. The three boys paused as they stared at where the boy once was.

“E-Eddie? Isn’t that…” Bill trailed off.

“That’s the name she said she was going to give her child. At least, that’s what my mom always said,” Stan confirmed. Richie was frozen, and only moved when he friends patted his back and pushed him towards the gate.

“C’mon, Richie. Let’s go home.”


	2. the thorns

Eddie wasn’t born a normal baby. He was a perfectly healthy little boy with two legs, two arms, and two eyes. His heart was sturdy, and his lungs were beautiful, but his face was completely off. You see, Eddie Kaspbrak was born with what his mother called a facial deformity. He had two perfectly round eyes, a mouth that stretched to a happy smile, and a pig’s nose directly where two perfect little nostrils should’ve been. She was right in a medical sense that it was a deformity, but she wasn’t right about how she decided to deal with it. How she delt with it was by faking Eddie’s death right after he was born.

The doctors couldn’t explain why Eddie looked the way he did. His early life consisted of doctors visits and surgeon consultations to try and fix the “deformity”, but no one felt comfortable putting such a young boy under the knife for what his mother wanted them to do. She was adamant, but she never really got her way by the end of it. What she wanted was too much, too cruel, too greedy for what any surgeon could realistically do with what they were starting with, and it was hard to keep her happy at home.

For the first five years of his life, Eddie never once looked into a mirror. Sonia had gotten rid of them all and even covered the ones she couldn’t take out by herself. Eddie didn’t even realize he _could_ see his reflection until he saw it in his spoon one time after his breakfast. He blinked at the little face in his silverware, and frowned at what he saw. His face looked nothing like the faces he saw in his books and on the television. His face was nothing like the ones that took care of him and saw him every time he went into the doctors office. His face was…ugly. He had a pig’s nose and he was always told that pigs are the ugliest farm animals by his mother.

That was the first time that he saw his deformity ever, and he cried immediately into his empty bowl of cereal. His mother took the spoon from him, and hovered over him for the rest of the day. That night he snuck into the kitchen to dig out the spoons again, and silently cried over his reflection.

“Mommy, what makes this surgeon any better?” Eddie asked in the car one day. He always had to sit in the back where the windows were blocked out and a mask on.

“He’s a special nose surgeon who just moved to Portland, Eddie-bear. He’s worked on a lot of kids with deformities like you,” Sonia explained. 

Eddie looked down at his hands and then reached up to adjust his mask. He hated wearing it all the time, but it was better than suffering from Sonia’s weepy eyes whenever he didn’t. By the time they got there, Eddie was still convinced the visit was going to be useless once again. He hopped out of the car, and Sonia quickly rushed them into the hospital. They checked in, and went up the elevator to the third floor. They walked into the waiting room, and waited until they were called into the surgeons room where they waited again.

“Mommy, I want to go home,” Eddie pouted.

“We’ll go home soon, sweetie,” Sonia promised. Eddie sighed and brought his knees to his chest. Eventually the doctor finally came in and greeted them.

“Good morning, Mrs. Kaspbrak. How are you this morning?” He asked.

“Wonderful,” she said not taking his handshake. “This is Eddie,” she introduced. Eddie also didn’t take his handshake.

“Okay, well, I’m Doctor Smith. I’m sure you know about my history considering this is a consultation for child reconstructive rhinoplasty. I’ve read a little into your case, Eddie, and I’d like to take a look at you. Can I remove your mask?” He asked. Eddie hesitated before nodding and moving the mask by himself. The Doctor nearly jumped at the sight of Eddie’s nose, and dropped his clipboard. “Oh! So sorry…”

“No, I’m sorry, sir. I should’ve warned you,” Sonia said. Eddie felt guilty, and he dipped his head to hide his nose.

“No worries! I just…didn’t expect the notes to be so literal,” he said and flopped through the file after picking it up. He pulled out an x-ray they took of Eddie after he was born, and examined it carefully.

“I don’t know why he was born like this, but it’s making us miserable. Please, doctor, is there anything you can do?” Sonia begged. Eddie noticed how close to tears she was, and that made a tear of his own roll down his cheek.

“Uh…I’m not sure, Mrs. Kaspbrak. From these x-rays, it looks like there’s a lot of traffic in that area,” he said as he tucked it away and set his clipboard down on the table.

“All…all the other doctors said it was…impossible,” Eddie stammered looking down still. Doctor Smith sat down in a wheely stool, and moved to sit in front of Eddie. He lifted the boys chin and took a closer look.

“Well…it’s not just bone, there’s also a large amount of cartilage. Plus, we can’t be certain of where the sinus’s are and whether the sinus region is more human like than pig like…I think we should take another x-day incase something has changed,” he suggested as he looked at Eddie’s face closely. Eddie blinked a couple more tears and then quickly wiped them away.

“Okay, we’ll do that,” Sonia said.

They got the x-rays done, and it was just as uncomfortable and scary as Eddie imagined it. His mother drove him home after that and they spent the rest of the day preparing for the weekend. Eddie cleaned as he always did, and his mother sorted out their medications before heading off to work. With the rest of the day to himself, he worked on his homework his mother gave him and made himself lunch once he was halfway through it. After that he finished his homework and finished up his chores. By the time he was done with the chores he started cooking diner, and his mother promptly took over once she got home.

“I told you I can take care of dinner, Eddie-bear. Your nose is too sensitive to be working with spices so closely,” she warned. Eddie nodded and waited for her to finish cooking at the dinner table.

They ate dinner, and after that Eddie was left alone once his mother was asleep. He usually felt lonely, but with his mother asleep, he truly did feel completely alone. His mother was the only person he could really talk to, and he hated talking to her. Once she was asleep, Eddie would go to his room and stare up at his ceiling thinking about the friends he might be able to make it he didn’t look the way he did. He had imaginary friends like most kids do, and he realized at a certain age that they weren’t real. Still, he kept those imaginary friends longer than most people do when they’re kids. It helped keep him sane.

There was nothing more frightening to Eddie than coming downstairs one day and finding another boy in his living room. His first reaction was to hide, but he froze for a split second to take in the sight of him. The boy had spirally messy black hair and thick framed glasses that made his eyes look weird. He was awkward and lanky, and his skin was paler than Eddie’s. He wore a jacket with a ridiculous Hawaiian shirt peeking out and jeans, and was probably tracking dirt on the carpet Eddie just vacuumed. The boy made eye contact with Eddie immediately, and Eddie scurried upstairs before he could think about anything else.

“Richard! Are you about finished?”

After that Eddie thought about that boy every single day. He guessed from his mother’s loud screeching that his name was Richard, but he knew literally nothing else about him. There was nothing about him that could give Eddie clues as to where he came from or where he was going. All he knew was that Richard was there once and gone, and that despite how scared he was when he first saw him, he hoped he would see him again. At one point he even dreamed of seeing him again. He wondered what kind of person Richard was, and if he would get along with him like the best friends in the movies do. He wondered if Richard would even want to be his friend if he saw what Eddie really looked like. Most of all Eddie wondered if he even wanted to risk showing himself in the first place.

It was six months before Eddie saw him again. Sometimes he liked to quietly take off one of the boards in his bedroom, and look out over his backyard. His mother didn’t know that he figured out how to remove it years ago, and he intended to keep it a secret. He liked to look at the grass even though it looked like it hadn’t been watered or mowed for the entire fourteen years Eddie had been alive. In fact, he knew it was probably longer than that. His only memories from the backyard was looking out from his window and the sliding glass door, and it had always looked like this. He always woke up early to watch the sun color the ground, but he didn’t expect to see a familiar nest of black hair by the shed. Eddie quickly covered his nose just in time for the boy to turn and catch his eye and he felt frozen again. It was Richard.

Looking at this boy was unlike looking at anyone Eddie has ever met. Although he had only really met adults and doctors. Eddie couldn’t remember ever meeting another boy his age. There was an ache in his chest to go downstairs and meet him, but he knew there was no possible way without his mother catching him and punishing him. If only he could break through the glass and safely jump out through his window. Escape this hidden life and finally talk to someone, anyone.

Before he could contemplate it anymore, his mother called him down for breakfast. He jerked his head in the direction of her voice, and then looked back to shyly wave with his free hand. The other boy just stood there as Eddie got up and hid behind the curtains before putting the board back in place. He then quickly changed into his clothes for the day, and hurried downstairs for breakfast. Sonia already had a plate laid out for him on the table with his orange juice and pills for the morning. He sat down and started eating, hungrier than usual after feeling a nervous burst of energy from seeing Richard again.

“Slow down honey. Just because you look it, doesn’t mean you have to be it,” Sonia said glumly. Eddie slowed down as his mother instructed, and then turned to look at her in the kitchen.

“Mommy, are you okay?” He asked. Sonia sighed and flipped her bacon.

“I got a call from that surgeon we spoke with six months ago, and…I’m so sorry, Eddie-bear, but he said there’s nothing he could do now without nearly killing you,” she announced. She sounded like she was holding back tears. Eddie felt his heart burn from her reaction. A part of him didn’t even want the surgery. It was scary.

“That…that’s okay, mommy, we can try another one—“

“There is no other doctor, sweetie. That was our last option!” She sobbed. Eddie stared at his eggs. Was he really that terrible to look at?

“…I’m sorry, mommy,” he murmured. She sniffled and pushed her bacon onto her plate.

“No worries, sweetheart. I’ll be going to church here in a little bit, and I’ll be running errands after that. I’ll be home a little after two, okay?” She told him as she came to set her plate next to his. Eddie nodded but didn’t bother to look up as Sonia kissed the top of his head. “I love you, Eddie-bear.”

“I love you, too, mommy…”

After Eddie’s mom left he went up to his room to cry. Normally when his mother left for errands he would sneak out to the backyard and feel the dead grass in his hands. Of course he would go out with a cover, but sometimes if he was feeling bold he would take it off for a moment and breath in the fresh air. It smelled so much better than the musty old house he was trapped in all the time, and he snuck out often enough to smell the different seasons. Winter was harsh and crisp and it melted into the happy and welcoming spring. Summer burned and stunk and simmered down into the woodsy chilling autumn. It was his favorite day of the week, and all he could do was cry.

“C’mon, my young fellow explorers! Off to the wilderness that is Mrs. K’s backyard!” A loud voice cheered from outside. Eddie could heat it clear as day despite all the layers between himself and the outside world.

“Sh-shut up, Richie! J-just because she isn’t home, d-doesn’t mean no one can hear us!” Another voice said.

“Oh please, like any of her neighbors talk to her,” the first voice argued. 

Eddie quickly took the board off his window and peeked out to see who was in his backyard. His eyes widened at the familiar boy, and his heart raced when he realized he had two others with him. He checked his watch. It was almost one fifty. He shoved the board back into place and threw on the nearest jacket and scarf before racing down the stairs and running out the back door. He stopped dead in his tracks as he stared at the three boys staring back at him. His heart was pounding, his nose burned from the late autumn chill, and his fingers shook as he blinked at the three boys in front of him.

  
“Y-you guys can’t be here…my mom will come back soon.”

That was the first time he had ever spoken to another boy his age. It was the first time he ever saw someone his age so up close even though they were eight feet away. For the first time, Eddie gave his name to someone who didn’t need it for his medical record, and it was exhilarating. He desperately didn’t want them to go, but he knew his mother would kill him if she found them all, so he begged them to leave. The first boy hesitated, and Eddie wanted him to stay the most. They locked eyes, both blushing until his friends pushed him towards the gate and they all left. Once again, Eddie was alone.

He missed them. It was silly because he knew absolutely nothing about any of them, but he missed them so much. He especially missed the one named Richard. Knowing that Eddie gave him his name always made him feel antsy and tingly. There was something special about knowing his name and Richard knowing Eddie’s. He had never shared that knowledge with anyone younger than thirty, and he couldn’t stop thinking about it. That hope from six months ago was suddenly rekindled.

A week passed before he saw Richard again. It was another Sunday, and his mother let him sleep in for once. She was already gone for church and left a note next to his breakfast saying she would be out a little longer than normal and would be back after three. Eddie sighed and then sat down to eat his breakfast by himself. Once he ate and cleaned his dishes he went upstairs to change his clothes. A loud clank against his window scared him, and he jumped again at the second clank. He quickly dressed himself, and removed the board that covered the window. He covered his face with his shirt, and peeked out the window to see Richard standing in his backyard throwing rocks. He stopped before he threw the next one once he saw his face, and smiled and waved up at him.

“Eddie!” He called. 

Eddie blushed bright red and turned around to close the window again. He hurriedly threw on a jacket and shoes and slipped on one of his many surgical masks before rushing down the stairs to his backyard. He hesitated behind his sliding glass door, and watched Richard pace back and forth waiting for him. Eddie then took a deep breath and opened it before stepping outside. The dark haired boy lit up when he saw Eddie walk out onto the grass.

“Eddie!”

“What are you doing here?” Eddie demande to know.

“I wanted to see you again,” the boy said excitedly.

“Why aren’t you at church with your family?” Eddie asked pointedly.

“Why are you locked up in Mrs. Kaspbrak’s dungeon?” He shot back with a smirk. Eddie frowned.

“It’s not a dungeon, it’s my home! I’m only fourteen, so I live at home,” Eddie replied defensively. He crossed his arms and pouted, but quickly felt off balance when Richie came up close to him and smiled over him. Shit, he was tall.

“I’m fourteen too! I figured you’d have to be around my age. That or younger. I guess you’re just tiny,” he said patting Eddie’s head. Eddie blushed and felt himself stiffen. No one besides his mother and his doctors have ever touched him, and neither of them have ever touched Eddie like _that_.

“I-I’m not tiny! Y-you’re just tall!” He argued. Richard laughed.

“Nah, you’re cute and tiny. Plus you’re funny,” he said.

“Sh-shut up, Richard! I’m not cute!” Eddie insisted. The boy stopped laughing and blinked at him.

“Richard? Ugh, only adults call me Richard. You can call me Richie,” he said.

“Richie…” Eddie practiced.

“At your service,” Richie said holding out his hand. Eddie hesitated, but accepted his handshake. He had seen it on tv many times, but it felt different holding another persons hand. “So, are you gonna answer my question?” Richie asked. Eddie looked up at him.

“Uh, what question?”

“Why are you locked away, Rapunzel?” Richie reiterated. Eddie blushed. Richie’s hand was so warm, and neither of them tried to let go so they didn’t.

“Don’t call me that. I told you my name is Eddie.”

“You got it, Eds,” Richie grinned.

“Ugh…I’m not locked away. I’m just sick,” Eddie lied.

“Is that what the mask is all about? You’re hiding your beautiful face, Eds!” He teased. Eddie rolled his eyes. If only he knew what was behind that mask.

“Yeah. My mom is a germ freak, and I think she’s passing it on to me.”

“Where is she right now?” Richie asked.

“Probably at church or the grocery store. She said she was getting home later than usual,” he answered.

“That’s good. Wanna hang out?” He asked. Eddie frowned.

“You want to hang out with me?” Eddie questioned. Richie nodded, his thumb rubbing gently against Eddie’s knuckles.

“You gotta be bored out of your mind in that house all alone,” Richie said. Eddie looked at their hands and felt warmth bubbling in his chest. Was this normal? Or was Eddie just starving for some kind of connection. He really liked Richie for some odd reason, and it was scaring him.

“Um…I mean…” he blinked up at Richie and his heart skipped. “I’m scared my mom will know,” he said.

“Know what?”

“That you were _here_ , idiot,” Eddie snarked.

“Oh…well, she won’t know,” Richie claimed confidently. Eddie raised a brow.

“She won’t?” He deadpanned.

“Nope. I’m super sneaky,” he winked. Eddie giggled a little at that.

“That’s stupid.”

“She didn’t catch me last time,” Richie pointed out.

“Yeah, because I told you to leave before she came home,” Eddie replied.

“Still, if you know when she’ll be home then she’ll never know,” Richie smiled. Eddie couldn’t help but smile back. 

There was something about this boy that unlocked a level of happiness Eddie had never felt before. The happiness felt warm and comforting, and it felt one hundred times better than how his mother made him feel that morning. He shyly lowered their connected hands and took a deep breath.

“Do you want to come in? She’ll be back around three today, so we have enough time to watch some TV,” he offered. Richie nodded.

“That sounds wonderful. Lead the way, Eddie spaghetti!”

“I told you, it’s just Eddie.”


	3. the steps

“W-why weren’t you at ch-ch-church yesterday, Rich?” Bill asked during lunch.

“I faked sick,” Richie replied truthfully before taking a sip of his juice box.

“What for?” Stan questioned.

“I saw that kid again. Eddie,” Richie answered them. Stan and Bill gaped at Richie.

“A-are you _insane!_ ” Bill squeaked.

“Richie, that’s dangerous. Who knows what Mrs. Kaspbrak will do to you if she finds you there,” Stan scolded. Richie shrugged.

“I knew she would be at church, and Eddie said she wouldn’t be back until later. So we hung out,” Richie said.

“Like you guys a-a-actually talked and spent t-t-t-time together?”

“Yeah, he’s actually really funny and he talks really fast when he gets riled up. It was fucking hilarious. You guys should come next time,” Richie suggested with a smile growing by the second.

“M-my parents wouldn’t b-b-believe me if I faked sick on a s-sunday. G-Georgie does that all the time,” Bill said.

“I’m free on Sundays,” Stan murmured.

“You should come next week!” Richie proposed.

“Won’t your parents think it’s weird that you always feel sick on Sundays?” Stan questioned.

“We can go after. Eddie says his mom usually runs errands until two o’clock. If we don’t waste any time, we could be there at twelve thirty and have a solid hour with him,” Richie told him. Stan hummed in consideration.

“D-did he say anything about the r-r-rumors?”

“What rumors?”

“About M-Mrs. Kaspbrak’s d-d-dead kid?”

“Oh…I dunno, I didn’t wanna ask. He just seems so lonely, I mostly just wanted to cheer him up. I mean…I think I’m like the only friend he has now,” Richie explained.

“That’s really nice of you to be his friend, Rich,” Stan said. Richie shrugged.

“I know if I was trapped inside my house my whole life, I’d want someone to be my friend…”

The rest of that week was almost painful. Richie had so many new wonderful memories from his day with Eddie, and he missed the little turd now. It turned out that he was actually a bit rude, and would bicker with Richie over almost anything. Richie didn’t mind that because he started bickering with Eddie just as much as Eddie started it himself. It was just how they functioned in the short amount of time they had to figure it out. Still, no matter how nasty or aggressive they got they always broke out into giggles, and Eddie’s giggle was always worth the arguments. 

Their arguments were actually fun. Richie had never spoken too someone or been spoken too like he had been in Eddie’s room. Despite everything being slightly muffled by his mask, every word they exchanged was charged. It was like heat melting away the shivers, and Richie quickly found it addicting the longer he talked and hung out with Eddie. It was still so strange to him how Eddie had just been existing here without anyone knowing about him. His whole life he saw Mrs. K’s house as an empty husk that held nothing but a bitter aging woman. He never would’ve imagined it held a boy he wanted to be best friends with the whole time. 

When the week finally came to an end, Richie groaned when he realized he still had Saturday to get through. Stan had finally agreed to come with Richie tomorrow, and he was excited to show off his new friend. He told Eddie he wanted to come back next week, and while he seemed nervous he still nodded. With Eddie’s blessing, he planned his route from the church to Eddie’s house. Stan was going to meet him at the church once the service was over since his house was close enough to it. Then would then walk instead of ride there bikes and hopefully get there by twelve twenty.

“Did you tell Eddie that you’re bringing another friend?” Stan asked as they walked away from the church.

“I mentioned that I’d try to bring one of you. We talked a lot about you and Bill actually. He’s literally never met a kid his age before. That’s so weird, right?” Richie said. Stan nodded.

“And his mom keeps him inside all the time?” Richie nodded back.

“She tells him that he’s sick and he can’t leave. That’s why his face is always covered. Super weird, huh…”

“God, that woman sounds awful. I bet there’s nothing actually wrong with him,” Stan said. Richie nodded again in agreement.

“I mean, he wasn’t coughing or sniffling the whole time! He was perfectly fine, and he has a good set of arms and legs too.”

“Damn…”

“Maybe we should try to sneak him out,” Richie suggested. Stan shrugged.

“I don’t know what to do about this, to be honest. Everything I’ve been told is that you can trust your parents, but what about other people’s parents? Who do we call about this? It feels like I can’t tell my parents because they’d deny it,” Stan explained. Richie nodded, feeling heavy all of the sudden.

“I mean, yeah me too. I dunno…maybe we should see what Eddie wants,” he said. Stan nodded.

“Yeah. What Eddie wants.”

Eddie did not want any of that. Eddie didn’t want a lot of things, and that was very apparent when Richie realized he might’ve forgotten that he was bringing a friend that time. If those wide eyes in his window told him anything, it was that Eddie was not pleased with what was going on.

“Who is this?” Eddie demanded to know once he was downstairs. Richie could tell he was pissed, but he tried to play it off. Stan didn’t seem impressed.

“This is Stan! He was with me when we broke into your backyard, remember? I thought I told you I wanted to bring a friend next time,” he reminded him. Eddie sighed and shook his head with his palm in his face.

“I can’t remember what I made up and what really happened, okay? My brain has been all messed up because of you,” he accused and crossed his arms.

“I can go if you don’t feel—“

“No, Stan, it’s okay,” Richie assured him and stepped closer to Eddie. “What do you mean, all messed up? Is it because you’re locked up all the time?” He asked. Eddie glared at him.

“I’m not locked up, okay?” He argued.

“You kinda are. I mean…even your windows are boarded up,” Stan pointed out. Richie pointed at Stan to show he had a point, and Eddie sighed.

“My mom is just…protective,” he said shyly.

“We wanna break you out, Eds! Set you free and all that shit,” Richie announced. Eddie’s eyes somehow managed to get wider in pure shock.

“Are you fucking crazy? Why the hell would I need to be broken out! And don’t call me Eds!” He snapped slapping Richie’s arm.

“Dude, you told me I was the first person you met your age. That’s not normal,” Richie told him.

“Do you have like some kind of autoimmune disease?” Stan asked. Eddie looked to him and dropped his defensive stance a little. Stan just emanated trustworthiness.

“I…yeah. If I get a cold…I-I’ll be put in a hospital,” he answered avoiding eye contact. That was odd, and Richie instantly picked it up.

“Still, that doesn’t mean you can’t go outside!” Richie protested. “We need to get you outta there, Eds. Your mom ain’t right in the head,” he insisted.

“She loves me, Richie. I’m her son,” Eddie deadpanned.

“We never said that wasn’t true, but I think what Richie is trying to say is that it doesn’t sound like you’re safe here,” Stan explained. Eddie furrowed his brows.

“Th-this is the safest place I can be! My mommy is the only one who knows how to take care of me,” he replied. Richie covered his mouth to stifle a laugh, and Stan and Eddie both gave him an irritated look.

“Sorry, but…dude, you still call your mom ‘mommy’?” He chuckled. Stan flicked the back of his head, and Eddie blushed so much it peeked out from the edges of his mask.

“Shut up, Richie,” he grumbled.

“Eddie, your mom must’ve gotten that information from somewhere. Your doctor or the hospital or years of medical records. You can find that information and take care of yourself, y’know? You can have a normal life,” Stan told him. 

Eddie seemed to be hugging himself more than crossing his arms. Their words overwhelming him to the point where he felt panicked and it was hard to breath. He quickly fumbled in his coat pocket and turned to take a puff of his inhaler under his mask. Once he did that he readjusted it and turned back to face them.

“I think you guys should leave,” he announced.

“Eds, c’mon—“

“I’m not gonna run away from home, Richie! I’m perfectly fine where I am!” He snapped again and glared directly at the curly haired teen. Richie felt hurt by that outburst, and was finally silent.

“I’m sorry we upset you, Eddie. We’ll leave you alone,” Stan assured him. Eddie nodded to him, but looked back at Richie with a sense of regret, sadness, and most importantly, longing. “It was nice meeting you.”

“You too…be safe,” Eddie said before turning back to his sliding door and walking back into his house.

“C’mon, Rich. Let’s leave him alone to cool down,” Stan urged. Richie felt his friend tugging at his hoodie, and he finally sighed and followed him out of the backyard and back to his house.

Richie couldn’t wait another week to see Eddie again. He was too antsy after their last conversation, and it was even messing with his sleep. Eddie couldn’t have been that brainwashed, could he? Maybe there was something he didn’t know about. Or maybe Eddie didn’t know what it was like to have a normal parent. Everyone knew Sonia wasn’t normal, and Richie remembered hearing his mother talk after a couple glasses of wine about how lucky her child was to have been a stillborn. Except apparently her child wasn’t dead. He was very much alive and hidden away from the rest of the world. Richie had to see him again before Sunday.

Wednesday night Richie snuck out of his house after midnight. He hopped on his bike and rode through the chilly autumn night air to Sonia Kaspbrak’s house. He parked his bike, and quietly opened the gate so he could sneak into the backyard. It was the quietest Richie had ever been in his entire life, and when he rounded the house and stepped out in the grass, he was surprised to see Eddie already sitting on his windowsill. His head was buried in his knees, and his shoulders were shaking as if he were crying. 

Richie quickly grabbed a little pebble from the grass and aimed for the wood so he didn’t make too much noise. Eddie’s shoulders jumped, but he remained buried in his knees. He slowly lifted his head until just his eyes peeked out, and Richie smiled and waved to him. Eddie quickly turned away and put the board back up. At first Richie thought he might’ve gone back to bed, but soon enough the outside porch light turned on, and Eddie emerged from the sliding glass door. He still had his mask on, and Richie was starting to get annoyed with it. Eddie probably didn’t even need it. His mother just told him he did.

“What are you doing here?” Eddie asked. He sounded like he had been crying too. Richie shrugged and walked over closer to him. Eddie back up until he was against the wall, and Richie stopped just shy of three feet away.

“I felt bad about how we left off,” he confessed. Eddie’s eyes widened for a split second before he looked down.

“My mom will kill you if she finds out you’re here,” he said simply.

“I don’t care, Eds. I wanted to see you again, and…and to say I’m sorry. I was being kinda pushy.” Eddie blinked at him again and relaxed against the wall.

“…thank you…” he murmured. Richie carefully stepped closer, and then moved to lean against the wall next to Eddie when he saw no reaction to him getting closer.

“Of course…I mean…end of the day, I just want you to be safe and to be happy,” Richie told him. Eddie was quiet for a moment, and then finally spoke again.

“I think…that was the first time someone said sorry about something unrelated to my condition.” Richie almost did a double take.

“Are you serious?” He questioned. Eddie nodded.

“Yeah.”

“Holy shit, bro. That’s kinda sad,” Richie said, unsure of how to respond to something like that. Eddie nodded again.

“I…yeah. My mom has been really sad lately too.”

“What about?”

“I had a meeting with a surgeon a few months ago. Apparently it was our last option, but he just called the other day to say surgery was too dangerous to perform on me,” Eddie confessed.

“Surgeon? Wait— _surgery?_ Holy shit, what for?” Richie’s voice pitched up in concern.

“Uh…there’s something wrong with my sinuses too. We’ve been trying to fix it since I was born,” he explained.

“Shit, is it deadly?” Richie asked. Eddie shook his head.

“No, it just…breathing through my nose is weird,” he said.

“Damn…” they stood in silence for a moment before Richie spoke again. “We should go somewhere,” he proposed.

“I already told you, I’m not running away, Richie,” Eddie deadpanned.

“No, I know, Eds. I’m saying we should like go somewhere and then take you back home safely,” he explained. Eddie looked at him, and Richie looked back.

“Now? Where would we even go?” Eddie challenged.

“Well, maybe not now, but we can go lots of places! There’s a park, and there’s an arcade in town, that’s my favorite. Uh, there’s the quarry with the lake, and we could even go to the library. I’ll teach you how to read,” Richie told him sounding excited.

“I know how to read, dumbass. I’m homeschooled, not locked up,” Eddie said nudging him. Richie laughed a little at that, and Eddie laughed a little with him.

“Still, we should do something. I’ll tell Bill and Stan to skip school with me and we’ll make a day of it,” Richie urged. Eddie thought for a moment and then looked back up at him with those big puppy dog eyes of his.

“Okay…my mom leaves for work around nine-thirty and she doesn’t come back until seven. On Friday’s she leaves earlier and comes home later,” he told him. Richie grinned as if Eddie just gave him permission to walk on the moon.

“Friday it is then!”


	4. the adventure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: internalized homophobia, implied homophobia, Bowers gang

What was he doing? Eddie asked himself that about four times ever since he woke up that Friday. Richie told him they would hang out today, and he hadn’t heard anything since then. Even if he had Richie’s number he had no idea how to use the phone since his mother banned him from it. He couldn’t call Eddie’s house because they never know when his mom might answer instead of Eddie, and that would instantly bust them. 

Still, going through his day on Thursday with no update was nerve wracking. He did twice as much for his chores, and ended up spending some time outside taking deep breaths because he simply felt like he couldn’t breathe half the day. Sleep didn’t come easy either, and finally fell asleep wishing Richie would be throwing rocks to wake him up. When he did wake up, his mother was gone for work as she usually was, and his body felt stiff as he realized today was the day.

Richie said ten, right? It was nine thirty-nine, and Eddie still hadn’t been able to eat all morning. He drank the juice his mother left out for him, but the idea of eating the eggs and toast made him sick to his stomach. He managed to nibble on the crust a little, but still couldn’t talk himself down from another panic attack. Richie was coming. They were going to spend the whole day together. Eddie was going to meet new people. He was going to explore the town he apparently lived in. He was going to have to hide behind his mask the entire day. How the hell was he going to survive? There wasn’t enough shit in his inhaler to get him through it.

Eddie’s train of thought was interrupted by a knock on his sliding glass door. He jumped away from his morning pills, half he couldn’t take without eating, and quickly ran to the cupboard under the sink for his spare masks. How stupid of him to walk around downstairs without his cover. If he had turned around just a fraction they would’ve seen his true form, and he hated himself for being so careless. Once he adjusted the straps over his ears he stood up and turned to see Richie, Stan, and another boy he assumed to be Bill crowded against the glass door. He rolled his eyes and marched over to open it.

“Great, I’m gonna have to clean that after we get back,” Eddie grumbled.

“It’s good to see you too, Eds!” Richie exclaimed and ruffled his hair. He groaned and shook his head before leading them inside. Richie walked right in like it was no big deal, but Bill and Stan were a little more weary going in.

“I just need to get my jacket, and then we can go,” Eddie said heading towards the stairs.

“Sounds good, spaghetti!” Richie called as he jogged up the steps. 

Eddie made a note to heckle him for that later, and quickly grabbed his coat and shoes in his room. When he came back down the three of them were all looking at different pictures hung on the wall. Of course non of them had Eddie’s face. If Eddie was in it at all it was hidden from view, and it was pretty obvious his mother was hiding it on purpose now that Eddie was looking at it all like that. He cleared his throat and lifted the bottom of his mask to force another bite of his toast as the other boys acknowledged him.

“Yo, Eds, how come your face isn’t in any of these pictures?” Richie asked bluntly. Stan elbowed him, and Bill looked just as what to know. Eddie shrugged and readjusted his mask into place.

“I dunno. My mom is the one who arranged them,” he answered and walked over to join them. Most of the pictures were of her and Eddie’s dad before he was born, and the few of him always had him wrapped up in a blanket and held by Sonia or one of his aunts.

“Damn. That’s weird,” Richie said. Eddie was the one to elbow him this time, and he walked to the glass door.

“C’mon. You said we were going out today,” he reminded them. Richie nodded excitedly and jumped to be the first one out.

“That’s correct, Doctor K. We are on our way to the arcade!” He announced as the boys left the house.

“A-arcade? I thought w-we decided on the l-l-library,” Bill said. He then turned to Eddie and held out his hand. “I-I’m Bill b-b-b-by the way,” he said. Eddie accepted the handshake, and noticed how it was underwhelming compared to when Richie shook his hand for the first time.

“Eddie,” he replied. Bill smiled and they continued to the front gate.

“The library is so boring! We need to bring adventure into this guys life!” Richie insisted to Stan, who had continued Bill’s argument for him after he decided to talk to Eddie instead.

“It’s too much, Richie. He’ll get overwhelmed. It’s best to take him somewhere quiet like the library or the park,” he told him. 

Richie sighed in defeat and opened the gate. Eddie stopped staring at the gate and felt nervous all over again. The other boys’ company had helped calm him down a little, but being confronted with the fact that he’s never gone past his front door without his mother before was scaring him all over again. The other boys filed out, but he stayed frozen staring at where his world ended and the rest of it started.

“C’mon, Eds, I got ya,” Richie said walking past and offering his hand. 

Eddie lifted his hand to take it, and only just then realized how bad he was shaking. He accepted Richie’s hand, and took an even shakier breath as the other boys touch somehow calmed him down again. He relaxed and let Richie lead him past the gate, and squeezed his hand tightly as he entered an entirely different world. Richie let go to close the gate, but returned it when he noticed Eddie grasping for nothing.

“Okay, yeah. Maybe let’s go somewhere quiet,” Richie agreed.

“Have you been to the library before?” Stan asked. Eddie shook his head.

“N…never. I’ve only been to the doctors office. Other than that, I’ve been home,” he explained.

“Sh-shit, dude,” Bill said.

“And I thought I had it bad when I got grounded,” Richie joked. 

Eddie managed to smile at that, but he realized none of them could see it behind his mask, so he squeezed Richie’s hand instead. That brought a blush to both of their faces, and they quickly let go of each other. It was strange because Eddie didn’t want to let go. Physical contact with Richie was so new, and yet Eddie like it. It made him feel safe. Richie made him feel safe.

“Alright! Off to the library!” Richie announced after clearing his throat.

The library wasn’t very far actually. It was chilly, and that made Eddie walk closer to Richie down the sidewalks. Bill and Stan seemed to be doing the same, but Eddie went as far as to cling to his arm too. It just felt right, and Richie seemed to like it too since all he could do was smile whenever they made eye contact. Stan and Bill talked a lot with Eddie, and Eddie was eager to talk with them as well. He learned that today was actually an excused day from school, so they weren’t actually skipping. That made him feel better knowing he wasn’t making them miss out on something. He hated the idea of Richie getting in trouble for him.

When they walked in it was very quiet like Stan said it would be. It wasn’t entirely empty like it might’ve been on a school day, but it was still on the spacious side. Richie lead the way from there, but the other boys seemed to be following a familiar path as they made their way to the comic books. Eddie had never held a comic book before, and he was surprised by how soft the pages were. His fingers rubbing the furry corners worn down from dozens of kids reading the same issue since it came out.

“This is my favorite Spider-Man comic. The cover is fucking awesome,” Richie said handing Eddie a new book. 

Eddie set the one he had back on the shelf, and then took the one Richie handed him. He flipped through the first few pages and smiled at the art. When he looked back to thank him, he found Richie already looking at him eagerly awaiting his response and watching his reaction. That made him blush, and it must’ve shown from the edges of his mask because it made Richie smile too.

“Richi—“

“Hey, Rich, isn’t this that weird X-Men issue you were talking about?” Stan interrupted. Eddie quickly shut his mouth and looked away blushing harder. Why did he feel so weird when Richie smiled at him like that? His heart felt like it was pounding out of his chest.

“Oh yeah. The plot was super wack,” Richie responded.

“R-really? I-I-I just read that last w-week and it was g-good,” Bill said. Eddie flopped another page.

“I dunno, I just thought it was weird,” Richie replied defensively.

“You think everything is weird,” Stan said.

“No, I don’t! I only think weird stuff is weird!”

“Y-yeah, but—“

“Boys, could you please mind your voices? Others are trying to focus,” the librarian said. Eddie jumped at the new voice and blinked up at the woman.

“Sure thing,” Richie said. Eddie suddenly felt very weird realizing someone he’s never met before was aware of his presence. He tried to avoid looking at her, but she looked concerned by his nervousness.

“Is everything okay, sweetheart? Do you need to sit down?” She offered. Eddie wanted to speak, but felt like he shouldn’t. Even though his mother was long gone at work in Portland, he feared she would be able to hear him if he did. Fuck, why didn’t he bring his inhaler?

“It’s okay, I got him,” Richie said wrapping an arm around Eddie’s shoulders. He felt that odd sense of safety wash over him, and he finally managed to nod and made eye contact with her.

“Just you, Richard Tozier?” She asked raised a brow at the young teen. Richie was suddenly stiff, and Eddie wanted him to relax again so he could feel at ease with him.

“I-I meant we…Stan, Bill, and I. This is Eddie. He’s our friend…just a friend,” he explained. The woman held his stare and then nodded.

“That’s what I thought. You should think twice about what you say, Richard. You never know how it’ll come across,” she warned and then walked away. They both let out a sigh of relief when she finally left, and Eddie had to resist the urge to hug Richie tightly.

“Jesus. Talk about homophobia,” Stan muttered.

“Fuck you. I’m not gay,” Richie replied defensively. Bill and Stan both gave him a questioning look.

“I never said you are,” Stan replied.

“You said that was homophobic, but I’m not a homo so whatever,” Richie continued. His arm remained on Eddie’s shoulders, and Eddie was completely lost in the conversation.

“Sh-she thought you were implying that y-you are. She w-was obviously wrong, but sh-she was also being h-homophobic about it,” Bill explained. Richie’s face was red. Whether he was embarrassed or angry, Eddie couldn’t tell. All he could tell was that Richie was uncomfortable and tense, and he didn’t like that.

“Are you okay, Richie?” Eddie whispered. His back straightened like he was struck by lightening at the sound of Eddie’s voice, and he shook his head before finally letting go.

“You guys are being fucking stupid,” he grumbled and marched out of the library. Eddie watched him walk out, and felt panicked to chase after him.

“Jesus Christ,” Stan sighed.

“I h-h-hate it when he gets like th-that,” Bill said. Eddie looked back at them.

“Like what?” He asked.

“Richie is just really sensitive when it comes to homosexual stuff. It’s kind of a hot topic right now, but he’s just…I dunno,” Stan replied.

“What…I don’t know what homosexual means,” Eddie confessed.

“Uh, it’s like when a guy likes other guys, or a girl likes other girls. Except it’s like romantic. Like how you like girls,” Stan explained. Eddie blinked.

“I don’t like girls,” he blurted without thinking. Bill and Stan looked at him with wide eyes.

“R-Really?” Bill asked. Eddie felt shy, not sure what exactly he was implying by saying that.

“I mean…I don’t really like anyone. I’ve never met a girl my age before…and you guys are the first friends I’ve ever had. Do you mean like…people you want to marry?” Eddie always felt a little sick thinking about marriage. His mother always told him it wasn’t an option for him until they fixed his face.

“Yeah, like that,” Stan confirmed.

“E-except gay people can’t get m-m-married. I g-guess none of that really matters to y-y-you, so why would your mom t-tell you, right?” Bill replied. 

Eddie nodded, but felt unsure of everything he was being told. He knew he never cared much for the women on his television screen, but the men? He dreamt of Clint Eastwood and James Dean on the regular, but he only thought that meant he admired them. He wanted to meet them and maybe be like them one day, but most of all he knew he felt bubbly and warm when he thought about his favorite actors on his television when his mother put on the old movies. Of course he also thought they looked good. They were famous for a reason, right?

“I-I think Richie is just o-over reacting. I mean, j-j-just thinking about guys sometimes doesn’t make you g-gay. We’re just t-teens now,” Bill said. Stan nodded in agreement. Eddie snapped out of his train of thought and put the comic back on the shelf.

“I’m gonna go check on him,” he announced before turning to walk away without a response. He opened the door to peek outside, and found Richie sat on the steps directly outside. Eddie closed the door behind him and sat down next to his friend.

“Hey,” he said. Richie was staring at the sidewalk. “…thanks, by the way…for uh…helping me with that lady. I felt so nervous I thought I was going to puke,” he told him. Richie shrugged.

“‘T’s whatever. I’m always here for you, Eds,” he said simply. Eddie smiled at that, and again realized Richie couldn’t see that. So instead he rubbed Richie’s arm, but the other boy jerked away. Eddie frowned at that.

“Richie?”

“Sorry, I just…I dunno if you should touch me. You might get…whatever the hell this is,” Richie sighed and ran his hand down his face under his glasses.

“Get what?” Eddie asked. Richie groaned and moved his hand up his face, pushing his glasses and his hair up over his forehead. Eddie’s heart felt tight when he looked at Richie’s profile like that. It was like when he looked at Clint or James.

“Please don’t hate me, Eds. I swear I have no fucking clue why it’s happening to me, but I just…” he trailed off and closed his eyes as he rubbed his forehead.

“I could never hate you, Richie. You’re the first friend I’ve ever had,” Eddie replied easily. Richie turned to look at him, but had to pull his glasses back down to take him in properly.

“I’m not…I’m not gay, okay? I just…sometimes my mind…I mean, girls are fucking hot and all, but…ugh…fuck,” Richie stammered and grumbled.

“What’s…what’s so wrong with being gay?” Eddie asked. Richie rolled his eyes.

“Don’t play dumb, Eds. It’s not cute right now,” Richie mumbled. Wait, right now?

“I had no idea this was a thing, Richie. Bill and Stan just explained it to me,” Eddie told him truthfully. Richie looked back to him and blinked.

“Shit, really? Fuck, I wish I never heard of this shit before,” Richie said. Eddie frowned. “I dunno why it’s bad. All I know was that ever since I started going to church and understanding the shit they were saying, I’ve been told being gay is a sin.”

“A sin?”

“Yeah, and I’m gonna go to hell if I…i-if I act on this shit,” Richie said. 

Eddie frowned deeper at that. He knew about heaven and hell and god. His mother taught him a little bit about the Bible when he was younger, but ever since he started homeschooling it wasn’t talked about. He never cared to pick up his childhood bible, and he never bothered to read it if he came across it while cleaning his room. Apparently that leather bound book told him what would and wouldn’t send him to hell.

“That seems stupid. It’s just a book,” Eddie said.

“A book my parents and this whole town is obsessed with,” Richie grumbled bitterly. “I hate going to church.”

“I’m always alone when my mom goes to church. I usually do chores,” he replied. Richie looked at him again and hesitated before reaching for his hand and squeezing it. Eddie heated up at that, but happily accepted the affection.

“I’m glad your mom forced me to bring that box in that one time,” Richie said. Eddie giggled and moved a little closer.

“Me too…it’s nice having someone to talk to. I feel less lonely with you in my life,” Eddie told him while they held eye contact. Richie broke it by looking down at his mask where his mouth would be, and then down to their hands.

“I feel less lonely too…”

“Hey, R-Richie! Eds!” Bill called. They both snapped their heads back to see him peeking from behind the library doors. “Y-you guys should c-come back in.”

Turns out while Eddie and Richie were talking, Stan and Bill has made a new friend. Ben Hanscom sat at a line table in the middle of the library looking through old books and newspapers about Derry, the town they lived in. He was still talking to Stan when Bill came back with the other two, and he was just explaining the fires and the hate crimes.

“What’s this shit?” Richie asked picking up a random clipping of a charred burned down church. “Seems boring.”

“Beep beep, Rich,” Stan said flipping through the book Ben lent him.

“Th-this is Ben,” Bill introduced them to the chubby kid sitting across from Stan.

“Hi,” Ben said with a smile. Eddie waved, and Richie continued looking through the papers and books spread out.

“I’m Eddie. This is Richie,” Eddie said.

“It’s nice to meet you. I’m actually new at school,” Ben replied.

“I’m homeschooled,” Eddie told him.

“Seriously though. What’s this about? We got a day off and you’re like actually researching shit?” Richie asked. Ben shrugged.

“I just thought it was interesting. This town is kinda weird. Lots of disasters and kids go missing all the time,” Ben replied.

“It’s probably because this town is fucking cursed. The people here do it to themselves,” Richie said. Eddie elbowed him and shushed him when he noticed the librarian giving him the stink eye.

“Ouch, that almost hurt,” he teased with that smile that made Eddie’s stomach flutter.

“Shut up, asshole,” he said quieter.

“J-Just this last summer there were a f-f-few kids going missing. B-Betty and that awful Patrick guy went m-m-missing along with a few others I can’t remember right now…my little brother G…G-Georgie almost went missing, but th-thankfully I f-found him before it was too late,” Bill said. Stan and Richie nodded remembering how terrifying that summer was looking for Georgie in the woods.

“That sounds like it was really difficult. I’m very sorry, Bill,” Ben said sympathetically. Who was this guy? He was sickeningly sweet and apparently smart enough to do research when left to his own devices? How did Stan and Bill pick him out of the crowd?

“Th-thanks…”

“We should hang out more. What classes do you have?” Stan asked.

“Uh, I think I actually have a class with all of you. English first period?” He said. Stan, Bill, and Richie all nodded together.

“Yeah, that’s right. I think I remember seeing you a couple times,” Stan said.

“M-me too,” Bill added.

“I don’t remember shit, but that’s definitely my first period,” Richie confirmed. Eddie giggled a little at that, and Richie shot him a little smile in response before picking up more papers that actually had text to them. “Holy shit, there was a fire thirty years ago?”

“We were _just_ talking about that,” Stan deadpanned.

“If you boys can’t keep your voices down, I’m going to have to ask you to leave,” the librarian said with her hands on her hips. 

Eddie jumped even higher than the last time the librarian snuck up on them, and even yelped a little. He accidentally clung to Richie’s arm, and blushed bright red as he realized everyone was looking at him. Everyone except for Richie who was glaring up at the librarian with a processive grip on Eddie’s arm wrapped around his. He ducked his head down and shyly moved away a little, but Richie’s grip prevented him from going far.

“You could say that nicer, y’know? Eddie’s really jumpy right now, and it wasn’t very nice of you to scare him like that,” he said bitterly.

“Richie, it’s okay,” Eddie assured him.

“Yeah, he’s been nervous all day,” Stan added standing up. The librarian glared at all of them and Bill put a comforting hand on Eddie’s shoulder.

“H-he’s been through a l-lot,” he said. The librarian sighed and then looked back to Richie.

“Remember what I told you, Richard. Also be mindful of your hands. You shouldn’t touch boys like that,” she warned before turning back to her desk. Richie was red in the face again and reluctantly let go of Eddie’s arm.

“Homophobe,” Stan muttered under his breath.

“What?” Ben asked.

“Stanley, I swear to god,” Richie groaned and started walking out again. This time all his friends followed, including Ben, and with Eddie trailing right behind him.

“I-I don’t get it. What was wrong with…w-with the way we were touching? Should I not touch you like that?” Eddie asked earnestly as Richie shoved the doors open.

“Yes! I mean—no, you can do whatever. She’s just—“

“Homophobic,” Stan added again.

“I’m not gay, Stan!” Richie snapped.

“Sh-she thought you were, b-but you’re not,” Bill said.

“What’s going on? Why did she think you guys were gay?” Ben asked feeling hopelessly lost.

“None of your business, haystack,” Richie grumbled as they all walked down to the park not too far from the library. They had to pass the kissing bridge to get there, and just the thought of being there with Eddie, even just in passing, made him tense again.

“Richie, I can’t keep up with you,” Eddie huffed as he struggled to walk next to him. Richie slowed down, and realized just how fast he was walking before. Eddie returned his arms around Richie’s, and he felt a little calm with the other boys warmth against him.

“Eddie is technically not allowed outside of his house, so he’s a little scared right now. Richie found him in Mrs. Kaspbrak’s house, and he made the first contact with him. That’s why they’re a little closer,” Richie heard Stan explain to Ben.

“That makes sense. They don’t even look gay. She’s just being old fashioned,” Ben said. Richie relaxed a little bit more hearing that, and returned his grip on Eddie’s arm.

“Sorry,” he murmured. Eddie looked up at him, and Richie still couldn’t get over how tiny he was.

“It’s okay…I’m glad we left. She made me very uncomfortable,” he confessed.

“We’ll never go back there again. Fuck her,” Richie said. Eddie smiled at that and rubbed Richie’s arm.

“Yeah. Fuck her!” he agreed.

“Fucking stop, Bowers!”

The boys all stopped when they heard a distressed voice yell from the path ahead. They were just about to get to the kissing bridge, and the voice sounded desperate to be heard. Richie froze and tightened his grip. Henry Bowers had been a fucking mad man over the summer, and he feared that he had only gotten worse. Ben, Stan, and Bill all ventured forward, and Richie continued with them once he was in the back with Eddie. As they walked down the path they could all clearly see Bowers and his goons harassing a smaller, darker figure on the ground.

“What did I tell you, Mikey? Get out of my fucking town, you stupid—“

Henry Bowers was cut off when a rock collided with his face. He looked up, and the rest of the boys looked back to see Eddie picking up another rock from the side of the road and hurdling it at the other guys harassing the boy. Stan and Richie quickly jumped over and started throwing rocks too, and Henry did his best to catch them or dodge them as they came.

“Fuck, is that Tozier and his fucking loser gang?” He asked laughing.

“Leave him alone!” Eddie called through his mask. Henry’s friends quickly started to retreat, but Henry was stubborn as always. Thankfully the boy being called Mikey had managed to crawl out of range of the rocks.

“Oh, fuck off, you little bitch! How old are you? Fi—“ Henry was cut off by another rock to the face and hissed. “Fuck! Fuck you kid! You’re dead the next time I see you!” He growled and ran off with the rest of his friends. The rocks ceased, and Bill was busy helping Mike stand up.

“Thanks…I thought he was gonna chew my head off,” Mike said as he brushed the dirt off of his clothes.

“N-no problem. I’m Bill.”

“Mike Hanlon. I live down at the farm people get their meat from,” Mike introduced himself.

“No wonder Henry picks on you,” Richie said. Mike didn’t know how to respond.

“Th-thats Richie. H-he’s an asshole,” Bill told him. Richie smiled and nodded.

“At your service!”

“Next to him is E-Eddie, and then th-there’s Stan, and here we h-h-have Ben,” Bill said going down the line. Mike nodded and smiled at all of them.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you guys.”


	5. Blooming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CAUTION: a lot of fucking fluff like holy shit this chapter is so cute aaaaa

After everything calmed down, Eddie decided it was time for him to go home. Richie agreed, and was thankful Eddie said it first since he didn’t want to be the one to stuff him back inside that house. The group of boys decided to split for the day, and to hang out again sometime soon. Mike, Ben, Stan, and Bill all went their own ways while Richie automatically started walking Eddie home without having to be asked. Their arms were linked the whole way, and they fell back into their usual banter and giggles they had when they were alone. Despite the house being empty, they decided to go around back and use the back door.

“I can’t stop thinking about Henry’s face after you hit him with that rock, dude. That was kinda epic,” Richie said. Eddie blushed deeply at that, and Richie loved how the color always peeked out from behind the edges of his mask. He also loved how his eyes crinkled when Richie managed to make him smile big enough. His heart was beating fast.

“I-I dunno what came over me. I just…didn’t think it was right for him to do that,” Eddie replied.

“You’re pretty badass, Eds. You’re really brave too,” Richie told him. He bit his lip hoping he didn’t see too much, but Eddie looked surprised to hear that.

“Me? Brave? There’s…I-I’m not brave. _You’re_ brave, Richie.” Eddie’s words surprised Richie, and he blinked at him with wide eyes before chuckling a little.

“ _I’m_ brave? What the fuck makes you think that?” He asked through his laughter. Maybe he looked it, but Richie knew what he was deep down. He was a coward. Still, Eddie nodded, his brows furrowed and his eyes adorably earnest.

“Duh! You practically risk your life coming to see me in the middle of the night! And you took me outside with your friends and we all stood up to that guy—“

“Henry.”

“We _all_ stood up to Henry,” Eddie doubled down. Richie couldn’t help but just smile at him and then shake his head.

“C’mon, Eds. That’s _nothing_ compared to you. You…like, your whole world must be fucking crazy now. You’ve been kept away your whole life, and all of the sudden I’m dragging you around town? That must be fucking terrifying. Trust me, spaghetti. You’re braver than you think,” Richie insisted. Eddie’s eyes were wide, and he shyly reached for Richie’s hands.

“I…I-I guess I never thought about it like that,” he murmured. Richie licked his lips nervously, and rubbed his thumb against the back of Eddie’s hand.

“I just…I just want you to know how incredible you are, y’know? It’s…I’m glad I met you,” Richie said. 

Eddie’s entire face was red at that and he surprised Richie when he let go of his hands and instead wrapped his arms around him. Richie was slow to respond, but eventually hugged Eddie back and let the smaller teen squeeze his midsection. It took Richie a few moments and a couple sniffles to realize Eddie was crying, and he moved his hands to cup his face again and gently guide him back to look down at him. His thumbs pressing against the fabric of Eddie’s mask, and reaching up to wipe his tears away. Eddie’s eyes somehow looked even bigger and more doey when they were drenched with tears, and the red rim around them made the greenish flecks in his brown eyes pop out. Staring down at him crying reminded Richie of just how badly he wanted to see the rest of Eddie’s face. Surely it wasn’t that bad, right? He could just—

“Rich, no!” 

Eddie quickly scrambled away before Richie could lift the mask from behind his ear. He pressed the fabric to his face to stay hidden as he desperately ran his fingers over the straps to make sure they were secure. Richie’s mouth opened to speak, but he couldn’t think of what to say. It was very obvious from the look of betrayal across Eddie’s face that he fucked up.

“I-I told you…I can’t…th-the mask stays on,” Eddie said firmly. Richie closed his mouth and then nodded.

“Yeah…I’m really sorry, Eddie,” he said hoping it would make things at least a little better. Eddie took a couple deep breaths before giving a little nod.

“…sorry…I just…it’s really important that it stays,” Eddie said a little more calmly. Richie shook his head.

“Don’t…don’t apologize, Eds. I shouldn’t have tried to move it,” he assured him. Eddie swallowed hard and gave him one last look before turning and walking up to his back door. “Eddie!” Richie called before he could open it. The other boy paused and then looked back at him again. Richie felt like he had the wind knocked out of him, and he struggled to speak until he forced himself to just spit it out.

“When can I see you again?” He asked hoping he didn’t sound as desperate as he felt. Eddie’s eyes darted down to the grass before returning to Richie.

“If you want…tonight. You can also come over on Saturday for a little bit,” he replied. Richie smiled at that. He felt relieved to hear he could come back.

“I’ll see you tonight then,” he said. Eddie’s face moved under the mask, and Richie assumed that meant he was smiling.

“I’ll see you tonight, Richie.”

This time when Richie snuck around to the backyard, Eddie was waiting behind the glass door instead of his bedroom window. He silently opened and closed the door, and Richie smiled the minute he saw him in his cute little hat. It was colder outside at night during the fall, and it was so incredibly adorable to see Eddie wrapped up in layers of sweaters and coats and scarfs. His beanie had a little beaver on it, and Richie instantly leaned down to press a kiss to its buck teeth. Eddie ignored that in favor of another hug, and Richie chuckled before hugging him back. It was nice to hug someone other than his parents and Bill and Stan. He didn’t hug Bill and Stan too often, but their hugs easily paled in comparison to Eddie’s hugs.

“It’s fucking freezing,” Eddie muffled against his jacket. Richie laughed again, and Eddie pulled back to shush him. “Be quiet!” He whisper-yelled. Richie took his hand and pressed a kiss to that too. He felt emboldened by Eddie’s decision to hug him, and he loved the blush that spread across Eddie’s face when he kissed his hand.

“C’mon. I brought a blanket so we can lay down without getting dead grass stuck up our butts,” Richie said holding up a rolled up blanket. Eddie looked at the fabric, and stayed still as Richie let go of him to unroll it and lay it out.

“I…what are we supposed to do on it?” Eddie asked. Richie grinned and looked up wiggling his eyebrows.

“Whatever you want, Eddie my dear,” he said. Watching his brows knit in confusion was worth the embarrassment of saying something so flirtatious to another boy. He wanted to say it regardless, but it helped that Eddie didn’t understand _why_ it would be embarrassing or what he was insinuating.

“Richie, I don’t know what you mean by that,” Eddie deadpanned. Richie chuckled and sat down on the blanket before patting the spot next to him.

“Nothing. Just sit with me,” he urged. Eddie did so, and sat closer to Richie than he thought he would.

“I’m still cold,” Eddie complained. Richie rolled his eyes and tackled him with a hug until they flopped onto their backs. Eddie giggled, and Richie loved the sound. His heart beating faster once again because of this strange boy he met on a whim.

“Is that better?” Richie asked wrapping his arms around him tightly. Eddie giggled again and nodded.

“Yeah…” he sighed and snuggled closer against Richie’s chest. 

The small boy quickly readjusted his mask, and looked up at the other boy. Richie quickly realized he was starring, but didn’t bother looking away. It was always worth the embarrassment to see the shock and shyness in Eddie’s eyes once Richie got caught. Instead of trying to hide it, Richie merely smiled before turning his head to look up at the stars. Eddie must’ve followed his gaze because Richie heard a soft gasp from behind the mask. At first he was confused, but it dawned on him that Eddie has probably never looked up at the night sky before.

“Oh my god…Richie…” he whispered while taking in all the constellations. Richie looked back at him, and Eddie was stuck looking up.

“Do you like it?” He asked. Eddie nodded wordlessly before looking back to him.

“I’ve never seen the stars before,” he confessed. Richie didn’t want to stop himself from kissing the top of Eddie’s head again, so he did it as softly and as gently as he wanted to.

“The moon is almost full,” Richie hummed.

“I’ll put a lasso on the moon for you, Mary,” Eddie said quoting his favorite Christmas movie. Richie chuckled and squeezed Eddie against his side.

“George Bailey is weak, I mean…a lasso? Nah, I’d just reach up and grab it. I’ll hand deliver it to you, free of charge,” Richie said. Eddie blinked up at him.

“You would?” He asked. Richie met his eyes and nodded.

“Of course I would. I’d hand it to you, and if you ever miss it in the sky, I’ll hang it up again. However you want it,” Richie promised. Eddie looked away to hide his red eyes, but Richie noticed them immediately.

“You’re so kind to me, Richie,” Eddie said softly. Richie furrowed his brows.

“Eddie…”

“Don’t get me wrong, you’re a complete asshole too,” he added quickly. Richie breathed a laugh at that.

“You got me there.”

“But…no one has ever spoken to me like this. No one…no one has every told me that I’m incredible or brave or anything like that, and absolutely /no one/ has ever…” he sniffled. “…ever made me feel so normal and special.”

“Well…you are special, Eds. You mean your mom never told you that you’re a good kid?” Richie asked. 

Eddie nodded and sniffled again. Richie felt his heart break when he confirmed that. There was no way this boy couldn’t know how wonderful he was. It was criminal that his mother didn’t build him up every day like he deserved. He pulled Eddie closer and hugged him tightly as tears soaked into Richie’s jacket.

“She’s wrong. Whatever mean things she says to you, she’s wrong,” Richie whispered against his hat. Eddie let out a quiet shaky breath and gripped the back of Richie’s jacket tightly.

“Thank you…for finding me,” Eddie whispered. Richie frowned at that and gently rubbed the other boys back.

“Of course. I’d do it all over again, Eds.”

They laid there for a while until Eddie calmed down enough and stopped crying. Richie helped him up and folded up the blanket before walking him to the glass door. Eddie stood outside it with Richie. Their hands knotted together, and neither of them wanting to let go. Richie finally did, but only to hand Eddie the blanket and insist that he keep it. He had no choice but to accept it with a blushing smile, and Richie gave him one last kiss to the top of his head. 

After that, it was a waiting game for Sunday afternoon. Of all the things in the universe, Richie hated waiting the most. He didn’t think it was a lack of patience, and felt it was actually more about being nervous. That and he did have a bad habit of being impatient too. Still, he felt nervous thinking about what Eddie’s day must’ve looked like. Waking up in that old house with a woman who didn’t even take the time to tell him how amazing he was. Under her constant watch with no freedom and a strict control over everything he put on or in his body. Richie hated thinking about that woman. He used to just be annoyed, but now that he knew what she’s been hiding he hated her.

“Do you think she’ll ever let you go to college? Or will she just keep you trapped here for the rest of your adult life?” Richie asked laying on Eddie’s bedroom floor. Eddie looked up from one of the comic books Richie brought with him, and then shrugged. He turned to his back on his bed, and then flipped the page.

“Not sure. I dunno if I’d even know how to function out there,” Eddie said.

“You’re capable of anything you wanna be, Eds,” Richie assured him. Eddie sighed and turned another page.

“It seems unlikely. She doesn’t like other people seeing my…” he trailed off and lowered the comic book a little. Richie sat up.

“Seeing your what?”

“Uh…my face,” he said. Richie furrowed his brows.

“What’s wrong with your face?” He asked.

“N-Nothing! She just…sh-she doesn’t like how…I’m just sick all the time. The mask makes people uncomfortable,” Eddie lied. It was obvious he was lying too, and Richie was getting more and more annoyed by that.

“You’re a really bad liar, Eds,” Richie deadpanned. Eddie turned his head and they made eye contact.

“I…” Richie shrugged.

“If you don’t wanna tell me, that’s fine, y’know? You don’t have to tell me everything, but I don’t like it when you lie to me,” Richie said truthfully. Eddie blushed, but it wasn’t the cute kinda blush he did. This blush was out of shame.

“I…I’m sorry, Richie,” he said. “You’re right…I don’t want to tell you.”

“I wish you would, but I get it. We all have our secrets,” Richie murmured and closed his book. Eddie sat up too and set his book down before swinging his legs off the side of the bed.

“Right. Kinda like…like how Stan and Bill don’t know what you told me outside the library—“ Eddie stopped talking when he noticed how stuff Richie was. Why would he bring that up? Was he uncomfortable with what Richie was doing? Was he going too far? Was he dragging him into the sin with him? “Shoot, Rich, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, Eds. Yeah, it’s kinda like that,” he agreed. Eddie joined him on the ground and sat on his knees right next to him. Richie avoided his eyes.

“Hey, i-it’s okay, right? We talked about how it’s just a stupid book, and it’s okay. I’ll never think you’re gross for it, remember?” Eddie sounded earnest again, and Richie hated how much he liked listening to Eddie’s voice. He nearly flinched when Eddie took his hand, and finally looked over at him. He could only imagine how scared he looked.

“Eddie, you don’t—“

“I meant it, Richie. I don’t feel lonely when I’m with you. I feel like I’m less alone now that I know you,” Eddie told him. Richie felt panicked.

“I-I’m not gay, Eds!” He said raising his voice a little. He was about to apologize immediately for yelling, but was completely speechless at what Eddie told him after that.

“I think I might,” Eddie confessed. Richie’s eyes went from wide to popping out. His face went pale, and he suddenly felt guilty for spreading his perverted desires to his sweet and innocent Eddie. He shook his head, but Eddie only nodded in response. “I think I have a crush on Clint Eastwood,” he blurted. That’s what made Richie finally break from his terror, and he actually laughed.

“Clint Eastwood?” He questioned. Eddie nodded, his smile big enough that Richie could see it move under the mask.

“And James Dean. I thought I just admired them, but I would like to marry one of them,” Eddie told him. Richie shook his head, laughter still dancing on his lips.

“Eddie Spaghetti, you sure do know how to pick ‘em!” He chuckled as he hooked his arm around Eddie’s neck and ruffled his hair.

“Richie! Stop, I’m trying to make you feel better!” Eddie complained. 

Richie smiled at that and kissed the top of his head once again. Eddie stopped trying to get out of Richie’s arm, and stayed still for a moment. That made Richie’s stomach drop, and he briefly wondered if he finally took something too far and Eddie wanted him to get out. Instead he was met with curious eyes when Eddie managed to get out, and was surprised to see those round eyes glance at his lips.

“Richie…could you…can you close your eyes for me, please?” He requested. Richie frowned.

“What for?” He asked. Eddie furrowed his brows.

“ _Please_ , Rich. I wanna try something,” he admitted. Richie sighed and then closed his eyes.

“Alright. They are perfectly shut,” he announced proudly. The sound of fabric moving met Richie’s ears, and he kept his eyes closed despite wanting nothing more than to just open them.

“Good…” Eddie muttered, but his voice sounded clearer. It wasn’t muffled.

Before Richie could think too hard about it all, he felt a soft breath against his cheek. His heart tightened as Eddie leaned his hand on Richie’s knee, and it nearly exploded when the other boys lips came in contact with Richie’s cheek. It was cute, and Richie didn’t expect anything less from Eddie. His lips were incredibly soft, and Richie tried to commit the feel of them to his memory. If he couldn’t see them, then he sure as hell would try to memorize them. His lips didn’t stay at Richie’s cheek for long, and Richie was about to ask for another one when he felt those same lips against his own. It was the first time Richie had kissed anyone ever.

“Keep your eyes closed,” Eddie whispered after the kiss ended. Richie nodded, and let him pull away despite wanting nothing more than to pull him in. A few seconds passed before Eddie sighed and then spoke again. “…okay. You can open them.”

“I dunno. I think I’m dead now,” Richie hummed. Eddie shoved his shoulder, and they both laughed together as Richie opened his eyes. “No seriously, I think I’ve died and gone to heaven. Is that what it feels like when an angel kisses someone?”

“Beep beep, Richie,” Eddie giggled. Richie took in that beautiful giggle, and cupped the other boys face so he could kiss his cheeks over and over again. “Ack! Get off me!”

“Can’t do that, sir. You’ve officially allowed me to claim you as my own, and I’m proud to say I’m gonna keep you forever,” Richie told him. Eddie laughed again and they hugged tightly on his bedroom floor.

“I think I can live with that,” Eddie hummed. Richie felt his heart melt as Eddie pressed their foreheads together, and smiled softly.

“Yeah…I think I can too.”

The next day was worse than the crash after the high. Not only was he away from Eddie, but he was also in school. He was never a big fan of school since it felt like a giant waste of time. It was all so boring and easy, and it was almost ridiculous how easy it was for him to get straight A’s. He sat in first period English writing down notes wishing that he was hanging out with Eddie instead. Safe and warm in his bed as they giggled and read more of his comic books together. It almost made his heart ache if he wasn’t so annoyed but Ben’s incessant sighing. Richie looked over at the other boy and frowned when he realized he was looking at the girl in the front row.

“Mind keeping your heart eyes to yourself, haystack?” Richie whispered. Ben snapped out of it and looked back to Richie.

“S-sorry,” he stuttered.

“Who you looking at, anyways? Miss Molly Ringwald over there?” Richie teased pointing to the red head. She had chopped her hair over the summer, and everyone was shocked to see how short it was. Ben shook his head.

“Her name is Beverly,” he replied defensively. Richie chuckled.

“Keeping tabs, huh?”

“No, I just…Ugh,” he shook his head. “You wouldn’t know love it it hit you in the face, Richie,” he sighed. 

Richie was silent at that for a moment, and blushed as he remembered how he spent all day yesterday pressing kisses to Eddie’s cheeks and eyelids. He felt a little sick when he paired those memories with the idea of being in love, and almost wanted to walk out at the thought that he was so far gone as to be _in love_ with Eddie. Then he remembered how warm it felt. How nice it felt to be open with his affection and his desires. Maybe he was in love with Eddie. Whatever it was, Richie didn’t want it to end.

“Whatever. At least I’m not a stalker.”

“Beep beep, Richie.”


	6. Growing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter really explains why Sonia Kaspbrak’s A plus parenting is tagged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lack of updates! Been busy going to job interviews this week.

Eddie stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. It was the only mirror in the house, and ever since Eddie discovered what he looked like his mother didn’t feel a need to cover it. There was nothing the mirror could tell him that he didn’t already know, or that his mother hadn’t already told him but harsher. He didn’t like to look at it for long, but ever since he shared that kiss with Richie, he couldn’t help but stare at himself in the mirror. He asked himself, was it really that bad? Would Richie hate him if he suddenly showed it to him? Would he think that Eddie is ugly because of it? Would it disgust him? Horrify him? Drive him away? The questions swirled in his head as he held his hand in front of his pig nose. He did that every time he did see himself in the mirror, and imagined how he would look with a normal nose. Maybe he’d have his dads nose…

“Eddie? Darling? What are you—“ Eddie’s mom knocked, but didn’t wait for Eddie to let her in. He looked at her through the mirror, and let his head down in shame before picking his mask back up and fitting it around his face. He turned to his mother and kept his head down.

“Sorry, mommy,” he murmured.

“No, _I’m_ sorry, Eddie-Bear. I should’ve tried harder to get you the help you need,” she said sounding close to tears. Eddie frowned deeply at that. He didn’t feel the need to fix it. He just wished it wouldn’t make him ugly.

“It’s okay, mommy. You tried your best,” he told her almost robotically. Sonia sighed and wiped away her tears.

“I did, didn’t I? Anyways, I came to tell you that your aunts want me to visit them this weekend,” she announced. Eddie jerked his head up to look at his mother with his wide eyes.

“Really?”

“Yes. I know, it’ll be scary without mommy home all weekend, but if I say no again they’ll never leave me alone until I say yes,” she said. Eddie swallowed hard.

“Am I not allowed to come?” He asked. Sonia gave him a pity frown and cupped his face. It was more like her fingers hovered next to his skin. She didn’t like to touch him. His own mother didn’t like touching him, but Richie didn’t need to think twice. He was always there to give Eddie the affection he craved.

“Oh, Eddie, you do love your aunts, right?” She asked. Eddie furrowed his brows at that question.

“Of course I do. I love them all,” he said.

“Then why would you want to subject them to your condition? Eddie, it’s not polite to show your face the way it is, and the mask will just make people feel sad for you. They love you too, but…honey, it hurts them when they see you like this,” she explained. Eddie felt his heart break. Was it really that fucking awful?

“I-I’m sorry…I-I didn’t think—“

“And that’s okay, Eddie. I’m here to help you,” she said and patted his head. “Now, take your shower, and we’ll have popcorn during our movie tonight. Do you have any requests?” She asked. Eddie fought back a sniffle and nodded.

“Can we watch…’It’s a wonderful life’?” He requested. Sonia frowned.

“Eddie-bear, that’s a Christmas movie,” she reminded him. Eddie looked at the floor.

“I know…I guess I’m feeling extra Christmassy this year,” he lied. “But…November is almost over too.” Sonia sighed.

“Oh, alright. Now, hurry up and get your water running. Don’t make it too hot, okay?”

“Yes, mommy.”

“Okay. I love you, Eddie.”

“I love you too, mommy.”

The rest of that week was hard. His mother’s words seemed to be getting harsher and harsher every day. One of the only things that got him through his mornings and evenings with his mother was the thought of all the kind things Richie said to him. Even though Richie didn’t know how horrible and terrible his face looked, Richie thought he was wonderful and brave. Richie liked holding his hand and keeping him close, and he liked to press kisses all over his face. He couldn’t wait until he came over on Friday night. They decided that they would always meet up that night and lay back to watch the stars together. It was now their night for the rest of their time together, and Eddie cherished it.

“Richie…” Eddie started. Richie hummed as he drew patterns against Eddie’s shoulder. “My mother isn’t going to be home at all this weekend,” he announced. Richie froze and then lifted his head to look at Eddie.

“What?”

“My aunts wanted to spend time with her, so she’s going up to Portland tomorrow morning. She won’t be back until late in the evening on Sunday,” Eddie told him. Richie stared at him in awe.

“You…wait, she’s _what?_ “ Eddie laughed at how happy Richie sounded.

“She’s gonna be gone, Rich,” he repeated.

“Holy shit, and she’s just going to leave you home alone?” Eddie nodded.

“She doesn’t want me to go. Says my aunts will just feel bad because of my mask,” Eddie replied. Richie frowned at that.

“Fuck her. You don’t need her. We’ll go out again. I wanted to take you to some of the stores around town and annoy the clerks,” Richie replied. Eddie rolled his eyes.

“How about we go for some ice cream instead,” he suggested.

“How are you gonna eat it, huh?” Richie challenged with a smirk. Eddie pushed himself up to look down at Richie and lifted from the bottom of his mask to expose his smile.

“I have my ways, Richard,” he replied and let the mask snap back into place. Richie’s eyes were wide, and Eddie blushed as he realized it was the first time Richie had seen a part of his face below his nose bridge

“Wait…can you do that again?” He asked. Eddie hesitated, and then pulled the mask up, stopping just below his nostrils and nervously biting his lip. Richie reached up and smoothed his thumb over Eddie’s bottom lip to stop him, and Eddie merely blushed some more and pulled away.

“A-Anyways, I was thinking maybe we could go to the quarry you mentioned that one time, and—“

“Eddie,” Richie interrupted. Eddie blinked down at him. “Can I kiss you?” He asked. Eddie felt like he was about to faint.

“I…you can always kiss me,” Eddie replied.

“Like, on the lips, Eds,” Richie clarified. If Eddie wasn’t blushing before, he was definitely blushing now. He finally had enough of his mind to nod and leaned down closer.

“Okay…um…” 

Without even asking, Richie took off his glasses and closed his eyes. Eddie felt his chest tighten, and he hesitated before pulling one strap off his ear and leaning down some more. They had only shared one kiss on the lips from the previous weekend, so it still felt new and exciting when Eddie pressed his lips to Richie’s. There was a spark between them that Eddie had never felt before from anyone else. When they kissed, the spark felt like a fire. It wasn’t very long like last time, and when it ended Eddie hovered over Richie’s lips again before speaking.

“The quarry…ice cream…and then we’ll go to the stores and annoy the clerks,” he whispered against Richie’s lips. Richie smiled and laughed before wrapping his arms around Eddie and holding him tight. Eddie giggled before fitting his mask back over his face, and reached around to grab Richie’s glasses.

“Sounds like a plan,” Richie hummed as he felt the plastic arms slide back over his ears. He opened his eyes again and smiled down at Eddie. Eddie smiled back.

“It’s a plan.”

That next morning Eddie woke up early enough only to say goodbye to his mother. An hour later after he finished eating his breakfast, Richie came over and they headed to the quarry to meet up with Bill, Stan, Ben, and Mike. Bill and Stan were already there when they arrived, Ben came a little bit after that, and Mike showed up twenty minutes later. He apologized and told them it was busy that morning on the farm, and they all nodded their heads in understanding and accepted. Richie told Eddie about all the times he went swimming with Stan and Bill in the lake, but it was too cold for them to do that now.

“You’re telling me you maniacs fucking jumped of this _cliff_ into the lake?” Eddie asked peering down the ledge. He held onto Richie tightly as he did, scared to let go and lean over by himself. Richie laughed, and Stan and Bill chuckled along with him.

“It’s not that far actually,” Stan said.

“Y-yeah. The water b-b-breaks the fall really well,” Bill added.

“You’re just a scaredy cat,” Richie accused and poked around Eddie’s ribs and waist. The smaller teen yelped and scrambled away from Richie and the ledge.

“No way, are you ticklish?” Richie asked. Eddie blushed and glared at him.

“No!” He replied all too defensively.

“How did I not find this out sooner? Come back here!” Richie grinned as he started to chase the other boy. Eddie yelped again when Richie almost caught him, and then immediately started running around the quarry to avoid him.

“Good to see they still get along as normal,” Stan hummed.

“What do you mean?” Ben asked looking away from the two boys playing cat and mouse.

“R-Richie has been a m-m-mope all w-week,” Bill spoke loud enough to catch said boys attention. He stopped chasing Eddie and put his hands on his hips.

“Who you calling a mope? I was _tired_ ,” he insisted.

“Aahhh!” Eddie screamed as he suddenly charged at Richie and jumped him.

“Holy shit!” Richie laughed as he was pulled to the ground. Eddie pinned him down on his stomach and sat on his back to keep him there.

“Fuck you!” Eddie yelled despite his smile peeking from behind his mask.

“Ouch…”

“I think he was just missing Eddie,” Stan said with a teasing smile. Mike chuckled at that, and nodded in agreement.

“Probably. They act like they’ve known each other for years instead of weeks,” Mike acknowledged.

“Fucking get off me, Eds! I can’t breathe!” Richie groaned and started to push himself up. Eddie merely giggled and moved to the side to sit next to Richie as he sat up and brushed the dirt off his jacket.

“Is it true? Did you miss me this week?” Eddie teased as he helped brush more dirt off his shoulders. Richie blushed, and then shrugged.

“Maybe a little bit,” he admitted. Eddie continued brushing off his sleeve until he got down to Richie’s hand. He gently started to play with his fingers and felt himself smile wider.

“I missed you too,” he replied. Richie blushed harder, and then glared at the other boys looking at them.

“Oh, fuck off, guys,” he said waving them away.

“Richie, believe it or not, we’re actually happy that you have a new friend,” Stan told him bluntly.

“He’s your friend too! We’re _all_ friends with Eddie! Plus now we got haystack and homeschool in the bunch too!” Richie pointed out. Ben and Mike nodded in agreement.

“That’s true,” Mike agreed.

“I-I guess what we mean is that w-we’re happy that you got a b-b-boyfriend,” Bill teased. Eddie didn’t quite understand the concepts of girlfriends and boyfriends, but if it meant that the way he felt about Richie was different from the way he felt about his other friends then he was more than happy with that.

“Is that what we should be? Boyfriend?” Eddie asked hooking his chin over Richie’s shoulder. The other teen was bright red, and Eddie only hoped the short talk they had last weekend would prevent him from freaking out.

“Do you even know what that means, Eds? C’mon guys, he doesn’t know much about that shit. It doesn’t matter,” Richie said remaining calmer than he did when that librarian insulted him. It was probably because they were all friends, but Eddie still didn’t want to push it.

“You guys are perfect for each other,” Ben announced without a trace of malice in his voice. Seriously, how could a kid like this be so sweet?

“Oh yeah? Don’t tell me you’re a romantic, haystack. Did you write Molly Ringwald a poem?” Richie teased. Ben got a little flushed, but didn’t back down.

“I may have slipped her a note. I just want her to know that she’s beautiful,” Ben admitted. Richie laughed at that, and Eddie elbowed him in response.

“Ouch! Darling, we gotta talk about the strength you’ve got in that little body of yours.”

“Fuck you! I’m not little!”

“W-who are you guys t-talking about? M-Molly Ringwald? The actress?” Bill asked.

“That’s just what Richie calls her. Her name is Beverly, and she’s in our English class,” Ben explained. Bills eyes widened.

“Oh sh-shit, Beverly Marsh?” He questioned. Ben nodded.

“Do you know her?”

“Uh—“

“He dated her over the summer,” Richie blurted. Ben and Bill both suddenly looked extremely awkward sitting next to each other.

“Shut up, Richie,” Stan sighed.

“What! It’s true!”

“W-we didn’t… _date_ , really. W-w-we just…hung out a lot,” Bill said.

“Yeah, with your tongues down each others throats. That was fucking gross, man!” Richie continued.

“Beep beep, Rich,” Stan added again.

“I-it was nothing s-s-serious! She’s moving to P-P-Portland after winter break anyways,” Bill said. Ben nodded.

“That’s okay. I honestly just wanted her to know she’s beautiful. I wasn’t expecting anything back from her,” he assured Bill.

“Richie, I’m hungry now,” Eddie told him while tugging on his sleeve. Richie wasted no time standing up, and pulled Eddie up with him.

“You hear that, young fellows? It’s time to hunt for food!” Richie announced and hooked his arm with Eddie’s.

“M-my mom said we can have l-l-lunch at my house today,” Bill said as the rest of the boys got up to follow Richie and Eddie.

“Ah, my true love, Mrs. Denbrough. Billy, remind me to schedule an extra date with her this week to show my appreciation,” Richie said. Bill rolled his eyes.

“Y-you’re not f-f-fucking my mom, Tozier,” Bill replied.

Mrs. Denbrough really was a sweet woman, and Eddie was instantly charmed by her. It was the first time he met someone else’s mom, and he was kind of surprised by how warm and affectionate she was with her children. She almost coddled Georgie every second she could, and still managed to include Bill and make him feel loved as well. Her cooking was amazing, and they all had a healthy portion of macaroni and cheese. She looked happy and put together, and when she saw Eddie’s mask he was only met with curiosity rather than grief or pity like his own mother said he would.

“So, Eddie, what did you say your last name was?” Mrs. Denbrough asked.

“Uh, he didn’t say it actually,” Richie said trying to avoid Bill’s mom finding out Sonia had a kid.

“My last name is Kas-“

“H-he just moved here, s-s-so you wouldn’t recognize it,” Bill interrupted. Eddie gave him a strange look and lifted the bottom of his mask again to eat the last of his Mac and cheese. Why were they being weird about this? Why were they lying?

“Oh, well what’s your mother’s name? Perhaps she should come over sometime and we’ll introduce ourselves,” she said smiling.

“Her name is So—“

“ _So_ unbelievably common. She likes to keep to herself actually, right Eds?” Richie interrupted and gave him a smile, but Eddie only frowned.

“Richie, what are you doing?” Eddie asked.

“You boys _are_ being very peculiar right now. Are you hiding something from me?” Mrs. Denbrough asked.

“No! Not at all!” Richie lied. Eddie sighed and looked back to Bill’s mother.

“My mom is Sonia Kaspbrak. We actually live just down the street. I’ve actually lived here my whole life,” Eddie said truthfully. Mrs. Denbrough dropped the cup that was in her hand and water spilled all over the counter.

“Oh, shoot! I’m so sorry, boys,” she said as she quickly wiped it up. Thankfully it didn’t spill far, and she cleaned it up in seconds. Once it was clean though she gave Eddie a strange look. “…you’re Eddie Kaspbrak?” She asked. Eddie nodded.

“M-mom…” Bill sounded nervous.

“That’s so strange. I thought…Sonia told me fourteen years ago that…honey, how old are you?” She asked.

“I’m fourteen,” Eddie answered. Mrs. Denbrough placed her hand over her chest and let out a tight breath.

“You’re…you’re really Sonia’s kid?” She asked sounding close to tears. 

Eddie blinked up at her, and then slowly nodded. Mrs. Denbrough then walked around the counter and pulled Eddie into a tight hug. At first he didn’t know how to respond, and didn’t understand why she was getting so emotional. Then he started to get emotional too when he realized his own mother had never hugged him the way Mrs. Denbrough hugged him. He still preferred Richie’s hugs, but this hug was nice and different in a good way. It was calm, loving, maternal. Everything Eddie wished he could get from his own mother.

“Little Edward Kaspbrak…I’m so…goodness, we thought you were dead,” Mrs. Denbrough said on the verge of tears. Eddie looked at Richie and then at Bill once Bill’s mother let him go. They both looked guilty of keeping a secret. “So sorry about that. I just thought I’d never get to see you. Sonia was always so insistant that you died after she gave birth, and she’s always so secretive.”

“She…she told you I died?” Eddie asked. Mrs. Denbrough nodded as she returned to her original side of the counter.

“Yes…it was heartbreaking too. She could barely say it without crying.” Eddie clenched his jaw and then glared at his friends.

“Did you guys know that?” He asked Bill and Richie. Stan also looked guilty, but Ben and Mike appeared as if this was all knees to them.

“…sometimes my mom would tell me that Mrs. Kaspbrak was supposed to have a son, and…and that he was supposed to be my age and that we would’ve been friends,” Richie confessed. Eddie felt his lip tremble and then sniffled.

“Eddie, we didn’t want to tell you because…we don’t know why she did it or if you knew,” Stan added.

“W-we didn’t know what to s-say or a-ask,” Bill nodded. Eddie sniffled again, and then looked up at Bill’s mom again.

“Thank you, Mrs. Denbrough…b-but I have to go,” he announced before jumping out of his seat and marching out the house.

Eddie could hear his friends calling for him as he ran further and further towards town again. It was crazy to think he even had friends considering he was apparently supposed to be dead to everyone. A lot of his mother’s behavior made sense when it came to keeping him inside. He hoped the main reason was to keep up the lie instead of hide him away for good, but he knew she was most likely just trying to keep him a dirty secret. It was already hard to breath in his mask, but the added panic of knowing his mother faked his death was unbearable. Thankfully he finally reached town, and was able to duck into a nearby pharmacy just as he heard Richie’s voice come closer. He stumbled through the door, and made his way down a random isle as he tried to catch his breath.

“Can I help you?” A gentle, yet snarky, voice asked him. Eddie looked up and blinked at the girl he had stopped to stand next to.

“Sorry…out of breath…” he panted and readjusted the mask.

“Well, that’s obvious. It’s kinda weird though considering you’re in the girls’ isle,” she pointed out. Eddie looked at the shelves in front of them and was faced with a million products labeled as “sanitary napkins” and “tampons”. He knew nothing about them.

“How is this the girls section?” Eddie asked. The girl laughed.

“They’re for girl puberty,” she told him. Eddie furrowed his brows.

“Okay…I don’t think I want to know about girl puberty,” he said. She laughed again.

“I’m Beverly Marsh,” she said holding out her hand. Eddie accepted it and shook it.

“I’m Eddie,” he replied. Beverly raised a brow.

“Just Eddie?” She asked. He nodded.

“Just Eddie.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And enter: Molly Ringwald. I wanted to bring Beverly in sooner, but I felt like it worked out the best bringing her in here. :)


	7. Retreating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one kinda sad ngl :/

“Oh! I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that,” Beverly said to the clerk while Eddie slipped out of the store with their snacks stored in his jacket. He could faintly hear the clerk reply as he left, and a good five minutes passed before she joined him down the block. She smiled at him as he pulled out the Hostess snacks he stuffed in his pockets.

“Nice job, Just Eddie. You’re kinda fun,” she said as she accepted the Twinkie’s he handed her. 

“Thanks…I think…”

“So, tell me what you’re running away from,” she urged.

“Uh…it’s a long story,” he murmured. She opened the package and started walking down the sidewalk. Eddie walked with her and opened his own snack.

“I’ve got time.”

* * *

“Eddie!”

“Fuck, where did he go?” Stan cursed.

“E-Eddie! Eddie where are y-y-you!” Bill called.

“Eddie!” Richie cried again.

He hadn’t been able to calm down since Bill’s mom started asking about Eddie. It was shitty, but he knew he fucked up by not telling Eddie as he realized just how much it would upset him to hear what Mrs. Denbrough had told everyone about him. Hell, Richie wouldn’t like it either if he was in them at position. He didn’t know a lot about Eddie’s mom, but he knew enough to get an idea of why she would want to fake his death. It was disturbing, and once again Richie wished that woman wasn’t so horrible. He wanted to take Eddie away from her, and give him the best life he could ever ask for.

“Eds! C’mon! We’re sorry!” Richie called as they walked through the quarry.

“Are you sure he would be here?” Mike asked. Richie sighed and then shrugged.

“I dunno…I thought maybe since we haven’t really gone anywhere else with him. He wouldn’t be at the library, that’s for sure,” Richie said.

“Maybe he went home?” Ben suggested. Stan shook his head.

“Eddie’s house was the opposite direction of where he ran. If anything he’s probably still in town. Probably dipped into one of the shops so we wouldn’t see him,” he replied.

“Fuck, you’re probably right,” Richie groaned and ran his fingers through his hair.

“M-maybe he’ll come back h-here,” Bill said sounding hopeful. Richie sat on one of the abandoned logs and sighed.

“I hope so…fuck, I feel like a real piece of shit right now,” he grumbled.

“What were we supposed to say, Richie? He would’ve been upset regardless of how he found out. There’s so much we don’t know, I don’t think he can blame us,” Stan assured him.

“He can do whatever he wants. I should’ve told him…told him _something_ ,” Richie insisted.

“Hey, don’t beat yourself up,” Mike said putting a hand on Richie’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I mean…th-this is such a weird s-situation. I dunno if Eddie’s mom sh-should even be able to k-keep him like that,” Bill said.

“He’s never even seen stars before! First time he saw it was last weekend!” Richie blurted.

“Jesus Christ,” Mike said sounding disgusted. He probably spent so much time admiring the stars on his farm that it sounded especially cruel to him.

“That’s something else,” Ben murmured.

“His mom is a real piece of work too. She is so cold to him,” Richie said sounding less mad and more…just sad. Stan came up to Richie’s other side and sat next to to him.

“We’re all worried about Eddie, but I’m sure he’s okay. If there’s anything I’ve learned about him, it’s that he’s actually pretty good at catching onto things,” Stan assured him. Richie nodded and sniffled.

“Yeah…it’s a shame he doubts himself so much. He’s really amazing, y’know…”

“Yeah, he…Eddie?”

Richie jerked his head up to see Eddie walking over to them across the quarry with the red headed girl Ben was admiring in class. Without thinking he jumped to his feet and ran over to hug him. Eddie let him, but was glaring at him when he pulled back. Richie merely hugged him again and was pleased to feel the other boys arms around him.

“Well this is cute,” Beverly said. Richie flipped her off, and focused his affection on Eddie.

“Eds, I’m really sorry. I just didn’t know what to say, and—“

“Ugh, just shut up,” Eddie groaned. Beverly giggled, and Richie sighed before nodding. The red head walked past them and joined the rest of the boys. It seemed as if everyone agreed to give Richie and Eddie some alone time.

“That’s fair,” he murmured still refusing to let Eddie go.

“I’m more mad at my mom, but…it would’ve been nice to hear from you first,” Eddie told him. Richie finally pulled back and rubbed Eddie’s shoulders as he nodded in agreement.

“I didn’t think Bill’s mom would ask you those questions, I swear. That and I just kinda forgot because I’m so used to you now. I can’t even like connect you with the kid Mrs. K was mourning,” Richie said. Eddie furrowed his brows and blinked a couple tears.

“I’m sorry I ran off…I was overwhelmed,” Eddie said.

“That’s understandable. If I found out that my mom faked my death and kept me hidden for my entire life, I dunno if I would handle it any better than you are right now.”

“It’s best to call it what it is…she’s locked me up. My house is basically a prison,” Eddie pouted. Richie bit his lip.

“Eddie…if you wanna…if you need some where to stay away from your mother…”

“Richie…I can’t leave,” he said.

“Why not? She’s done nothing good for you,” Richie pointed out sounding desperate. Eddie let his head fall and pressed his forehead to Richie’s chest.

“I wish I could, Rich…but she’s the only one who…wh-who knows what’s wrong with me,” he murmured. Richie lifted his head to face him with his finger under Eddie’s chin. Their faces were close, and Richie felt like his breath was being taken away.

“Eddie, there’s nothing wrong with you,” he whispered. Eddie whimpered at that, and suddenly hot tears flooded down his face.

“B-but there _is_ , Richie. She didn’t want anyone to _see_ me for a reason,” he sobbed. Richie reached up with his thumbs to wipe Eddie’s tears, and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“She’s just lying to you, Eds,” Richie assured him.

“Richie, I’m…I-I’m not—“

“Look at this! The faggots got a new boy toy, huh? Was my cousin not enough for you, _Tozier?_ “ 

Richie looked up with wide eyes as Henry, Vic, and Belch approached them. He held Eddie tightly against his chest and started to back away as they got closer. Henry merely laughed and stopped walking to cross his arms.

“Is that your little boyfriend, Richie? Isn’t he the one who threw fucking _rocks_ at me?” Henry hissed.

“Leave us alone, Henry,” Richie grumbled. He could hear his friends walking up through the leaves behind him, and felt more confident with everyone so close to him.

“Get the brat,” Henry ordered. Out of no where, Vic seemed to appear next to Richie and successfully jerked Eddie out of his hands.

“No! Let him go!” Richie growled.

“Richie!” Eddie cried as Stan and Bill tried to pull Vic off of him. Unfortunately Belch was bigger and stronger than both of them together.

“Fuck off, you stupid kids!” He yelled and pushed them both to the ground. Eddie winced. It looked like it hurt, and when Mike and Bev tried to get at him he merely pushed them away too and kicked them for good measure. He then joined Vic and grabbed Eddie’s other arm.

“Eds!” Richie tried to run after him, but Henry quickly stopped him and grabbed the front of his shirt. Vic and Belch stopped just close enough for Eddie to see the fear mixed with fury in Richie’s eyes.

“It’s one thing to see you try and flirt with my cousin, but watching you _kiss_ a boy is really fucking gross,” Henry sneered.

“Fuck you!” Richie growled before spitting in his face.

“Richie, no!” Eddie screamed, but he was too late. Henry punched Richie square in the jaw, knocking him and his glasses to the ground. Eddie struggled against Vic and Belch’s arms, but eventually landed a successful kick to Vic’s shin.

“Shit! Fuck you, you brat!” Vic growled flicking his ear. 

“Ow!” His retaliation only provoked Henry to get on his knees and punch Richie again. “Stop it!”

“Leave him alone, Henry!” Beverly cried out as she struggled to stand up. Richie was still trying to find his glasses in the leaves when Henry flipped her off and then get up to turn towards Eddie again.

“What’s with the mask, you little bitch? Is it to block out the _disease_ Richie was trying to spread?” Henry teased.

“Fuck off, Henry! Leave us alone!” Eddie screamed. Henry laughed cruelly, and reached for the mask, but Eddie did everything he could to avoid his hands ripping it off. Eventually he was met with a sharp smack, and he could feel his skull vibrating from it.

“Don’t touch him!” Richie shouted. He was still blind, but Ben had joined him in helping him look for his glasses. The others were all shouting too, but with Richie blind and Stan and Bill now hurt there wasn’t much they could do.

“Let’s see what you’re hiding under here,” Henry said as Eddie still tried to avoid him.

The smack really did shake him up because before he knew it the mask was ripped from his face and he was confronted with crisp and harsh unfiltered air. He tried turning his head to hide himself, but it was obvious from the sudden silence from a Henry that he was fully exposed. A sob left his lips and he was suddenly pushed away from Vic and Belch like he was made of fire. His hit the ground, scrapping his knees and the butts of his palms as the two bullies gagged at the sight of him. 

“Holy shit! What the fuck is that!” Vic yelled.

“Fuck, that’s so gross!” Belch said. Eddie looked up just as Richie put his glasses on, and he was about to hide his face when Henry grabbed it and held it up for everyone to see it. He whimpered and tried desperately to wiggle out of his grip.

“You seeing this, Tozier? You’ve been making out with a fucking pig!” He said laughing maniacally. 

Fresh tears were running down Eddie’s face as he tried to turn himself away. His eyes were squeezed shut as he struggled in Henry’s grasp. He couldn’t bare facing his friends after being so exposed. Surely this was it for him. They’d all laugh at him and reject him. Tell him that he’s ugly and disgusting like Vic did, and chase him home so he could never come out again. He’d be doomed to living with his mother for the rest of his life, and no one would bother to see him again. _Richie_ would never bother to see him again…

“Let him go!” Beverly cried.

“Fuck this, dude! I’m not touching that thing again!” Belch said before turning and running away with Vic. Henry growled and pushed Eddie to the ground again. He wiped his muddy boot on Eddie’s cheek, and then kicked him for no good reason.

“You really are a fucking freak of nature,” he said before walking off after the others.

Eddie was shaking on the ground, and everyone was really quiet after they had left. His eyes wouldn’t stop leaking tears, and he was so scared to lift his head. So he stayed hidden a little bit longer before finally looking up. They were all staring at him, and when he looked back they all seemed uncertain. He pushed himself up, and he noticed Richie coming closer. He scrambled to his feet out of fear and backed away holding his hands over his nose. Richie stood up too, but Eddie only backed away more.

“Eds—“

“Richie…” Eddie sobbed before turning around and running home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :0 oops


	8. Sprout

Watching all of your worst fears come true and unfold in front of you is absolutely terrifying and heartbreaking. Eddie had a small glimmer of hope that maybe they wouldn’t care. Maybe they wouldn’t stare at him like he’s a freak. Maybe Richie would still like him even after he showed his face. He was just gathering up the courage to tell him everything and show him his face for the first time when Henry arrived. Instead of something calm and controlled, his face was shoved into Richie’s. Tear soaked and scrunched to try and hide. It must’ve been so ugly, so terrifying to see him bare faced like that for the first time. He hated it.

Eddie sobbed the entire time he was running home. He covered his face with his hands, and was surprised that he wasn’t passing that many people. It made him feel better to run down an empty street. That meant he wouldn’t subject anyone else to the horror planted right in the center of his face. This horrible nose that he was cursed with ever since he was born that caused him so much pain in his life. When he finally did get home, he went through the glass door since his mother locked the front door. He ran up to the bathroom, and proceeded to vomit down the toilet. His stomach was a mess of anxiety, undigested food, and pain from running so much that day.

“Fuck…” he sighed and threw up again.

Once he was certain his stomach was clear again, he flushed the toilet and washed his face in the sink. He then rinsed his mouth, brushed his teeth, and looked down at the scrapes across his palms. He’s seen his own blood before, but it was always weird seeing it outside a container or a needle. He’s also scratched himself before on accident, but it was cleaner than these scrapes. Seeing the dirt prompted him to wash his hands, and then dig under the sink for the first aid kit. He cleaned the cuts on his hands, and then pulled off his jackets and sweaters and pants to address the cuts on his knees. He wiped them with hydrogen peroxide, and then spread ointment on them. The ones on his knees he put big bandaids on, but the ones on his hands he couldn’t stop staring at.

He was Doomed. Capital “D” Doomed. His mother was coming home that next day, and there’s no way she wouldn’t see the scrapes and the bandaids. Even if he wore pants, she would find them. She’d find out his secret, and even if Richie miraculously decided to keep seeing Eddie she would shut it down in seconds. The rest of his life he’d never be left out of her sight. He’d never be able to go outside again, and he’d never be able to make friends again. He was truly and honestly Doomed, and he only cried harder staring at the cuts.

Eventually, he got himself to calm down enough to clean up the kit and gather his stuff so he could carry it to his bedroom. He closed his door, and then pulled on a new pair of pants before taking down the board to his window again. She could never take this away from him. She has never found out that he even knew how to do it, and therefore it was his only safe place. He set the board to the side, and then crawled into the windowsill. The entire time he had been home he didn’t once feel the urge to wear his mask again. Why would he? He never did when it was just him. His mother was the only person who told him to wear it. He could never figure out why she kept him if she wanted him gone so badly.

Eddie’s eyes felt heavy from the tears, and he almost fell asleep, but they snapped wide open when he heard the sliding glass door open from downstairs. He held his knees to his chest, and buried his face into his knees as he felt hot new tears roll down his cheeks. God, did Henry follow him here? Was Richie here just to get another look and then break everything off with him? Did the whole group want to come and laugh at him? Point at him? Throw up just by looking at him? He felt sick to his stomach again, and if he hadn’t been so confident that it was definitely empty from before, he would’ve feared he’d throw up again.

“Eds?”

Eddie jumped at the sound of Richie’s soft voice through his door accompanied by an even gentler knock. It sounded small and controlled like he knocked with just one knuckle so he wouldn’t scare him. Unfortunately everything scared him, and he was only shaking harder when the door creaked open. He watched from behind his curtains, but quickly looked away when he saw Richie swiftly walking over to him. He looked out the window, and squeezed his eyes shut only to feel more tears. Just as the other boy pulled back the curtains Eddie moved his nose under his arm, and only hoped Richie wouldn’t try to see it again.

“Hey…are you okay? Henry didn’t go easy on you like he did on me, y’know?” He said. Eddie could tell he was hoping he’d laugh, but he was too busy preparing for the worst. “Um…everyone is really worried about you, but…they didn’t want to overwhelm you by coming inside. I told them I’d check up on you—“

“You don’t have to pretend to worry about me, Richie,” Eddie murmured. There was a stretch of silence that made him uncomfortable, and when he heard Richie struggle to find words he figured he hit the nail on the head.

“I…I just…I’m sorry, _pretend?_ “ Richie questioned once he finally developed actual words. 

He sounded angry, and that tugged at Eddie’s curiosity. He glanced over and saw the bruise forming under Richie’s eye and against his jaw. His brows knitted in concern, and he automatically turned to face him for a better look. Eddie didn’t even register his own hands or the fact that he was fully exposed, but when he saw his fingers reach for Richie’s face he quickly pulled them back and covered his own face in shame. Just as he was about to apologize, Richie grabbed his wrists and pulled them away.

“Goddammit, Eds! Just…calm down, okay?” He said sounding distressed himself. Eddie still tried to turn his head away, but failed when Richie cupped his face ever so gently and turned his head to face him. He blinked up at him with weepy eyes, and Richie just simply looked at him. He looked at him for a long time.

“You don’t have to torture yourself, Rich,” Eddie murmured. Richie furrowed his brows and wiped a tear away with his thumb.

“What makes you think I’m torturing myself?” He asked.

“You’re just _staring_ at it,” he whispered. Richie shook his head and leaned in closer to get a better look at his eyes.

“Eds, I’m looking at _you_ , okay? I’ve never…I’ve never seen your full face before. God, gimme a break, okay?” He replied. Eddie pouted, and Richie smiled a little. “Y’know, I always imagined what you’d look like when you were pouting, but this is way cuter than anything I could come up with.” Eddie blushed and shook his head.

“Sh-shut up, its not cute! It’s…it’s ugly,” Eddie said.

“What’s ugly? I didn’t say anything about ‘it’. I said that you’re cute,” Richie reminded him. Eddie glared at him.

“Stop ignoring it! You can clearly see it! It’s right there, Richie! You can’t miss it! It’s ugly and terrifying!” Eddie sobbed. Richie pulled him into a hug, and Eddie continued to cry into his shirt.

“Eddie…I don’t care about your nose,” he told him. Eddie shook his head. There was no way he could just brush this off so easily. This was why he was locked up. This was why he didn’t deserve to leave the house.

“Y-you should! It’s…i-it’s hideous. I’m a _freak_ ,” Eddie cried. Richie merely stroked his hair and hugged him tighter.

“I mean…it’s not normal, sure, but neither are the rest of us,” Richie assured him. Eddie sniffled.

“The rest of us?” He questioned.

“It’s not normal to have a stutter, or to be super into bird watching, or to study on days off. It’s not normal to live on a farm and be homeschooled, or to have red hair, or…to be a loudmouth trash talking gay idiot, but…y’know. We probably all found each other for a reason,” Richie explained. Eddie pulled away to look up at him.

“That’s…it’s different,” he decided.

“How?” Richie asked.

“It…it just _is_ , Richie. My whole life…my mom has been trying to fix me. She’s been trying to get me into surgery and she’s been hiding me so no one will look at me,” Eddie told him. Richie cupped his face again and wiped more tears.

“What for, Eds? Because she doesn’t like the way you look? That’s her issue. It’s honestly not that bad. I might be biased, but I’d go as far as to say it’s not bad at all. In fact, I think it’s cute,” Richie told him.

“ _Cute?_ Are you out of your fucking mind! My mom cries if I don’t wear the mask around her!” Eddie’s voice was raspy from all the crying, so his shouting was more like squeaking. Richie shook his head.

“That’s _her_ fucking problem, Eds! Do you see me crying? Did you see any of those losers crying? Vic might’ve been a douchebag, but he’s a fucking idiot. I’ve seen him flirt with dogs before,” Richie said sternly. Eddie sniffled again and wiped his nose with his sleeve. Richie watched in wonder, and quickly found himself loving this part of Eddie.

“Richie, I’m…ugh—“

“Eds…” Richie leaned down closer to him again. “Eds, can I please kiss you again?” He asked gently. Eddie blinked at him with wide eyes.

“You actually want to kiss me still?” He asked sounding like he was on the verge of sobbing. Richie chuckled a little and nodded.

“Yeah, of course I do, Eds. I already told you, I think you’re cute,” he said. Eddie blushed.

“You…you said my…nose is cute…” Richie nodded again.

“I did, and I meant it. I really do think it’s cute Eds. It makes everything about you even cuter,” Richie hummed. Eddie almost couldn’t believe it. His highest hopes was that Richie would at least be okay with it, but _this_ was too good to be true.

“I…” he shook his head. “No, I…you shouldn’t…I know what you’re really thinking, okay? I-it’s not—“

“What I’m really thinking? I fucking hope so, because I’ve been telling you what I’m really thinking this whole time,” Richie interrupted sounding irritated again. Eddie dropped his head and held his hands on his cheeks.

“Don’t just sit here and tell me what I want to hear, okay? I don’t believe you’ve looked at me and _not_ think about how terrifying it is,” Eddie cried. 

“Eddie, I think you’re the cutest guy I’ve ever laid my eyes on. I’m not lying when I say I don’t care about how you look, it’s about everything else, Eds,” Richie said desperately. He pressed their foreheads together, and Eddie’s lips quivered as he listened.

“Everything else?”

“Yeah…the conversations we have. The company we keep. You could be a fish for all I care! I just like you, okay?” Richie said. Eddie looked up with wide eyes at that.

“You like me?” He asked. Richie blushed but nodded anyways.

“Of course I like you, Eds. Do you think I’d do anything like this if I didn’t? I like you so much it hurts,” he murmured.

“Me too! I like you—“ he cut himself off and frowned deeply.

“Eds?”

“My mom always said no one would like me the way I am. She said it would be cruel of me to talk to kids my age because of my nose. I never thought…I always told myself that this type of thing wasn’t meant for me,” he confessed.

“Fuck, a lot of things really make sense now, y’know? Your mom is literally so stupid,” Richie said.

“She’s not…she’s just not sure what to do,” Eddie murmured sounding hopeless.

“Why would she say that to you? It’s literally not hard to look at. If anything you’d want to cover up because people /want/ to look at you.”

“Because I’m a freak?”

“Because you’re so cute, Eds,” Richie corrected with a smile. Eddie finally cracked a smile of his own, but paired it with shaking his head.

“I like you, too, Richie. I’m just scared,” he admitted.

“Scared of what?” Richie asked.

“Scared…that everything my mom says is true. That people will hate me. That you’ll eventually change your mind and see just how awful it is, and…just, everything.”

“Eddie, you’re so much more than your nose,” Richie whispered leaning closer. Eddie pouted again, but let the other boy come closer this time. “Like, yeah it’s not normal, and it’s very cute, but there’s so much more to you.”

“Richie…” he put his hands on Richie’s shoulders.

“It’s okay to be scared, but please trust me when I say I’m not going to change my mind. I _like_ you, okay? I’m like crazy about you,” Richie cooed. Their lips were so close, and Eddie could feel Richie’s breath against mouth.

“I like you too. I think I like you more than I like Clint Eastwood,” Eddie confessed. Richie laughed at that, and Eddie giggled with him before wrapping his arms around his neck.

“Can I kiss you now?” Richie asked politely. Eddie bit his lip briefly before nodding.

“Please do…”

With permission, Richie leaned in the last little bit and kissed Eddie on the lips. It felt nice to be able to initiate it, and he held Eddie’s face ever so gently while the other boy played with the curls on his nape. This time the kiss lasted a little longer, but it was only because Richie felt like Eddie could slip away at any moment. He was so close, and he didn’t want to leave him alone. It was interesting to feel his nose brush against his cheek, but it was interesting in a good way. Everything about him was good. He made Richie so happy just by existing. There was no way he could change his mind and decide to hate him. He couldn’t change how much he loved him.

_Ah. Love._

“Um…” Richie spoke softly after ending the kiss. “…the rest of the gang is kinda waiting outside,” he announced. 

Eddie’s eyes nearly popped out of his head and he whipped his head around to see his friends walking around his backyard. Stan and Ben seemed to be having a discussion while Bill and Mike were looking through the shed. Beverly was the only one watching them, and she wore a smirk as she took a drag of her cigarette. He blushed bright red and then turned to glare at Richie.

“You couldn’t have told me that sooner?” Richie blushed as well and shrugged.

“I dunno! We were having a pretty intense conversation,” he replied. Eddie groaned and shook his head before pushing past him and pulling his sweaters and jackets back on. Richie quickly followed him and helped him pull the fabric down.

“I hate you so much sometimes,” Eddie grumbled as Richie wrapped his scarf around him and picked up his hat from his dresser.

“Only sometimes though, right?” He said with a smile that Eddie couldn’t be mad at. He rolled his eyes and reached up on his top toes to give Richie a peck on the lips.

“Only sometimes,” he agreed and started heading downstairs with Richie hot on his heels.

“So that’s what the mask was about,” Beverly said when they came out of the house. Eddie blushed out of embarrassment and nodded.

“Yeah…um…sorry about…everything,” Eddie said. The other boys came around too and they were all standing together in Eddie’s backyard.

“What are you sorry about? You didn’t do anything wrong,” Stan said. Eddie shrugged.

“I guess I feel bad about how you all found out…my mom always makes me wear the mask because she doesn’t like the way it looks. She says it’s impolite for me to show my face,” he told them all.

“R-r-really? Just because of your n-nose?” Bill asked. Eddie nodded.

“I swear to God, I’m never hand delivering that woman her newspaper ever again,” Richie said as he moved behind Eddie and wrapped his arms around his waist. Eddie’s cheeks flushed pink, but he only smiled as he touched Richie’s arms over his stomach. He hooked his chin over Eddie’s shoulder, and they leaned on each other. The rest of the group didn’t bother to question it. Beverly only smiled at it.

“It seems really unfair for her to do and say those things. I can understand homeschooling. Bowers is awful, and it would probably be hard going to a public school, but just completely banned from leaving the house? Not allowing people to even know you exist? That’s uncalled for,” Mike said. The whole group nodded in agreement.

“She’s probably going to find out I’ve been outside now because of these scrapes. That means she’ll probably watch me even closer and it’ll be harder to see you all,” he told them. Richie held him tighter.

“Eddie, I don’t think you should stay here,” Beverly said. Eddie blinked at her. “You should be in a home that loves you.”

“Who could love someone like me?” Eddie asked.

“W-we love you, Eds. All of us l-l-love you,” Bill told him. He looked at all of his friends and sniffled a little.

“I don’t…I don’t know where to go.”

“We can figure something out,” Stan said.

“Like what?” Eddie asked.

“I’m not sure yet, but we can,” he assured him. Eddie sighed and turned to press his forehead against Richie’s temple.

“I should be getting home. It’s a long walk from here, and it’ll be getting dark soon,” Mike announced. Everyone nodded in agreement. It was important to all of them that Mike got home safely.

“I-I should probably go too. My m-m-mom is probably really worried after l-lunch. I-I’ll walk with you, Mikey,” Bill said. The two of them started walking off, and everyone waved goodbye to each other.

“It is getting late, isn’t it? You guys should probably start heading home too, huh?” Eddie said. Beverly nodded along with Stan and Ben.

“Probably. If Bill’s mom said anything to my mom she’s probably a little worried,” Stan said.

“My mom doesn’t like me out for too long,” Ben added.

“My dad is probably pissed,” Beverly sighed.

“Well…thanks for today. I’ll hopefully see you all again some day. It was really nice meeting you Beverly,” he said. She nodded and gave him a little love pat on his arm with her fist.

“You too, Eddie. I’m glad I got a chance to. I’ll see you again, promise.”

The three of them left the backyard too, and Eddie waved goodbye with Richie. He returned his arms around Eddie, and hugged him tightly. It felt good to have that affection, and Eddie only realized after they started hugging each other how much he missed it when he let go. His mother never hugged him like that, and so he didn’t even know what it felt like until he hugged Richie for the first time and was met with reciprocation. They said nothing for a while as they stood outside Eddie’s back door. Then Richie was pressing kisses against Eddie temple and the side of his head and he snuggled closer. It really was getting close to sunset, and the wind was picking up too.

“Rich, you should probably go home too,” Eddie said.

“And leave you all alone? Fat chance, spaghetti man,” Richie replied stubbornly. Eddie frowned. Even though he knew Richie shouldn’t stay, he was glad to hear that Richie didn’t want to leave him alone. Mostly because he didn’t want to be alone, but also because it meant Richie wanted to stay with him.

“But…your parents—“

“I’ll tell them I’m staying the night with Stan or Bill,” he answered before Eddie could complete his sentence. Eddie sighed and then finally gave in with a nod.

“Okay…I’ll take you to the phone,” he said and took his hand. Richie followed him inside, and they both shivered when they stepped in. It was a lot colder outside than they realized. “I have no idea how to use it…my mother never taught me,” he said as they walked through the kitchen to the living room.

“Really? That was one of the first things my mom taught me Incase I needed to call the police,” he said.

“She told me it wasn’t important for me to know…” Richie shook his head.

“I really can’t understand what goes through her head.”

Richie made a call to Stan first to tell him the plan, and then he called his parents. They let him stay as he predicted, and when he hung up he started to pull off his jacket and smiled big at Eddie. Eddie smiled back at him and surprised him with another hug. Richie hugged him back, as expected, and they stood there in the living room just holding each other.

“Thank you, Richie,” Eddie whispered.

“For what?” Richie mumbled against the top of his head.

“For everything. I’ve been so much happier with you in my life. You and Bill and Stan and Ben and Bev and Mike…I never thought I’d ever have friends because of how I look,” he said.

“That’s what friends do. They make you happy. That’s what family should do,” Richie told him. Eddie sighed.

“My mother only makes me cry…”

“Then she’s not your family. Not really. We’ll be your family, Eds,” Richie assured him. Eddie smiled at that and nuzzled against Richie’s neck.

“Okay…I like the sound of that,” Eddie whispered. Richie giggled, and Eddie loved the sound more than anything else.

_Ah. Love._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so so late. I got distracted with other stories and I’ll be honest my mental health has been really fucked up for like all of 2020 so far so I’m a little out of wack rn. Thank you for the love and the patience.


End file.
